ITS OVER

Why do i find myself crawling back when i know i can walk stronger than that...............why am i running out of tears when i haven\'t even got over my fears.......................why is it me? why is it now?when do i get an explanation how????????how can he say i am a good person when i still haven\'t learned my lesson.................why did i think at first he caredand in the end lost everything we shared........................why isn\'t he ever callingwhen he knows all i\'m doing is balling.how does he just walk over what we hadand still leave me down and sad why am i sitting here writing this when i cant even remember our last kiss...................why do i make myself think its not over with him even though i know even the largest chances are slim........................ how can he be so over everything, when i am still not understanding................. he has a life to live, but so do i as of right now mine dont exist without my cry....................how can he be truely in love with his ex, when he moves from one girl to the next .............i thought he really wanted to be with me i guess i didnt open my eyes wide enough to see......................why is my heart shattered so badly that i cant live a normal life daily..................why did he break my heartand expect me to go back to start..................i am in the begining with nobody not even him now my chances in another relationship are slim .................because i have him in my heart forever and always throughout all my living days....................how do i just \"GET OVER IT\"when my courage is so low all i can do is sit...................... i need a teacher to help meone who can use my eyes to see.................... why am i all on my own convincing myself our relationship has out grown.......................... he can sit back and live a happy life when i am sad because i thought i would be his wife........................ so i was wrong all along nothing can describe where we are, not even a song................................. why is this holding me back when its supposed to get me back on track...................... why do i have to wait so long to understand what i did wrong, i thought everything was going great til i realized i was LOVE BAIT...........................twenty years from now i see myself the sameand he has moved on and is full of fame.................................well i hope he\'s living a wonderful life for the both of usbecause i will still be deep down here in the dust.............................our eyes may see the same thingbut our hearts and minds seek nothing........................which is why i want an answer to all my questionsbut i cant ask without any hesitations...........................i am scared of being hurt this badly againso i am not willing to put myself where i have been.................................i hope one day soon he\'ll understand which will only exist if i join a rock-and-roll band...............................he will finally have an understandingthe day i have ocean-front property in Wyoming...................................The day he wants me back never has nor ever will arrive, at least not as long as i am alive. .................. Written By: Stephanie Grossman................................. 1/15/06