Wow, that was a really heart touching poem. You describe it so well i could feel all the thought and see myself there. Its quite long. But full with emotion well done babes

Take care
Much love
alex xxx

Very interesting hun very i like your style keep it up

Sam:

This poem has great potential, but this is still an idea that needs to be refined into a great poem.

Your first and second stanzas are really good… But they all are random…They can be re worked. But they need to be cut down. Here is what I thought:

“There are moments lately when I see me
being the desperate person I used to be
Is now coming through in my faulty designs
Totally afraid that this will always be my trap

This person I told you I so dearly despised
This desperate, sad clichéd person
Distraught & dismayed, wanting to turn round and take some steps back.”

See I made two stanzas by just one of your stanza’s…Your poem needs work. It has the emotion, now all it needs is your personal poetic style.

I love ur poems yet u cannot let anything overcome u u have to keep fighting through life. 5/5

Omg wow... this was awesome. 5/5