Comments : Last Sorceress

  • 13 years ago

    by Charles OConnor

    Very emotional and very good.

    Charles O'Connor "In everything I am an outsider"-H.P. Lovecraft.

    (authorsden.com/charlesdoconnor)-check it out.

  • 13 years ago

    by Brittney Follett

    This is very good, i loved it 5/5 keep writing!

  • 13 years ago

    by Kara !

    It's a good concept for a poem, but I felt it lacked emotion. I couldn't empathize with the sadness and anger that I am guessing you was trying to portray.

    "Deciding to kill all the ones
    Who made her life unglued."

    I feel that could have been more assertive. determined, in the place of deciding, for example, would have been a better word to use.

    I did like it how you changed gears in the middle, with the "She hates.." part. It felt like it broke up the poem in a successful way. And I could picture what the scene must look like, which is a very strong part of good imagery poems.

    Keep up your writing. You have a lot of potential. x

  • 13 years ago

    by pagan

    I like this because i think on some level it happens to people today

  • 13 years ago

    by goddess-glamourpuss

    This had some great imagery and i loved the final stanza, especially the last lne. I think the repetition in the middle stanza spoils it a little. I think if you just had she hates once and let the rest flow that would be better.

  • 12 years ago

    by katie

    The rhyming seems a little forced...
    the beginning startef out powereful but it was kind of lost in the end.
    overall i liked it though:)