I agree with ~TheRavensGhost~ I think this was a great write but "fitted isn't a word! so like she said you could say "who never fit in" or something along those lines! Yeah but i would definetly change either the 2nd or 4th line! The flow was good! This was probably your best poem i have read so 5/5!! Well Done!
[She was a lost soul
Who never fitted in
No friend to call her own
She just wanted to fit in]
^^You rhymed 'in' with 'in'...That's not really rhyming lol.
[But even the person people think are strongest]
Suggestion: The person people think is the strongest
^^Just a suggestion. Take it or leave it. I just thought the line was too long for the rest of the lines.
Over all, I think it was ok done. It wasn't the best poem. I thought the rhyming was very cliche, and you could've used harder rhymes. The flow wasn't that great in places, but that can be fixed. I did like the story of the poem a lot. I thought it resembled me a lot. =( Yes, quite sad I know lol. Well keep it up! =) 4/5 xoxo
I really enjoyed reading this poem.You can see everything happening so clearly.the girl just running her expression of happinesss always being fake.until finally h er story of life comes to an end and she dies cutting her wrist.
~Jo Anna EL