That is a great poem, 5/5

"So take the knife push it deep look at my face the pain runs deep." Maybe another words instead of deep twice, but it still put its steel-cold, mesmerizing point across.

"you may find life unfair but there are many who never cared many hearts are shallow ." I was sure you were going to write hollow, but it was so true how it says shallow... for hearts always have SOMETHING in them, but sometimes just not much.

I'm not so sure about the ending, it was shocking.. in a way, it was very true, but in a more bitter sweet way than the rest of the poem.
At the start it was an acidic feeling, like a nosebleed that didn't hurt, but you still felt the warm blood, more like a metaphoric shock, while the ending was like when you accidentally bite your tongue; a sharp, twisted shock.
Well, that's just me, and I'm weird, so don't worry about it.
Some rhymes were so unique...

//T.L.//

I didnt like the opening line, but the rest was decent, with a few lines that showed your true potential. Im being harsher on your poem than alot that ive read, because I think you could do better.

I like this poem, but maybe you could break up the paragraphs into lines? I think that it may have more impact to the reader if it were presented that way. Nonetheless, I like it a lot.

"For seen" is actually spelled "foreseen"
You also rhymed deep with deep. Well, ok to be honest, the poetry style of this was not great, but the contents of the poem were. You had good ideas, and good imagery, but you just didn't write them out right. Still, just keep trying.

You're very creative with your writing, I like it. The emotion and heart were amazing. Nice work, truly.

Very emotional !!! ) nice job!5/5

I like it alot, it shows passion and emotion. but i hope this isnt how you actually feel in real life because alot of your poems are like it. if its just poems then i understand. but in real life no person deserves to live that way. no matter what they have done or what was done to them.

This is probably one of the deepest poems i have ever read. The emotion spills out of it and the pain in the poem just pours out like a waterfall
You are a true amazing writer and i wish you would keep writing because you are really really good!