The Jean Buying Disaster

by loretta Taylor   Oct 24, 2006


The Jean Buying Disaster

Shopping has become an exercise in futility for me
There's nothing out there
For a middle-aged grandma to wear
I just wanted a pair of jeans
It should not have been a monumental task

But there I was, running from store to store
Like a chicken with its head cut off
Finally coming to the realization
That is was not meant to be
There would be no new jeans for me

I did find a commonality though¦
In each and every place
The jeans had no waist
I jumped in numerous pair
And in every one my midriff was bare

Oh, they were cute enough, to be sure
On a lithe young body
With tiny little hips
A scar free tummy
And a belly button ring

But I am painfully aware
That no one out there
Wants to see me
A middle-aged woman
With a caesarian scar

And, the cute little camisole tops
Are made for cute perky little boobs
I'd have to have mine custom made,
Industrial strengthed
At Martha the tent- makers shop

So I went home empty-handed
Resigned, feeling maligned
And I pray that some day
That someone with compassion
Will be in charge of fashion

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by Connie

    Oh my...you made my stomach hurt as I read this and laughed!!!!

  • 17 years ago

    by UNbrOKen

    That is really cute i thought it was really really really good

  • 17 years ago

    by robin milford

    I can way relate with the problem in this poem and it was so funny thanks for the laugh

  • 17 years ago

    by sibyllene

    Haha, this was excellent because it's so true.... way to show real life!

  • 17 years ago

    by Midnight Sun

    HAHAHA! Trust me YOU ARE NOT ALONE! Lol....great job! Made me laugh. And I totally understand where you're coming from,lol. Keep it up!
    ~Jules