Wow really ur first? Well ur a natural! great work indeed u should write more!
I like the rhyming too! 5/5

Hey thts a good peoms for a first!!!

You express ur feelings betta than me hun keep it up
xxtake carexx

Great poem for a first time. you are quite good keep it up.

Wow! this is a really good poem for it being your first...ver nice job!

5/5

~michelle~

Excellent...
5/5
very good write

love
amy
pls comment on my poem i'll never be fine

Yup. your definately good at the stuff!! hehe well done hun, this was great. going to read the second part now!
Much Love And Many Kisses, Bex.

I luv this poem!!! just wondering...... whos demise it is that your planning??? but hey ur a really good writer!! keep writing!!!

For your first poem that was amazing. the flow was great and the emtion was even strong enogh for a poem as short as this one. well done once more 5/5

Like the others ... first poem? Great job!

Gooooooooooooooood work:):):)

your first work and its the best too:):):) Iloved it:):)

keep up the good work i really like your poem and i wating for something more:):):)

khuloodan:):)
smile all the time:):)

For your first ever, you didn't do too bad. Keep writing. And make it real (even in the fantasy). I like it..

Forever more
-mello