Wow! this one is good...is this the one you read to me on the phone?

Wow ^o^

I like this poem. the only thing i would suggest is that you dont push the rhyme as much. otherwise that, this poem in very good

I liked this poem although i found the ryhme to be a little forced like it didnt flow naturally from you like it has in other poems. But well done none the less. a great effort~mel