For some reason, I just really liked this poem. I can't exactly tell you why, it's just...so...original. I've never read anything like it, but it was still really good. I think I can kinda pick up on your message, so if it's what I think it is, you did a GREAT job. 5/5 in my book!

"She hikes her skirt up; giving those boys what they crave,
And down on the dance floor she becomes the music's slave,
Twisting and turning her body; shaking it Hollywood style,
She flashes her milky smile; with a drug dealer on speed dial."

I liked how you repeated this stanza in the beginning and in the end,, great poem 5/5
Janaynay

This took alot to comprehend since my mind has been strecthed today from work but i found it a good explicit poem, you really can write them good huh, lol. flow was good so i give it a 5/5!!! keep them coming!!!

Okay well dear. i believe that this is an awsome poem. i love it sooo much it is freat. and shows alot of feeling in it. good work dear. i liked how you put your words. any other way would kill the poem. good work . lol :P

Wow, nice story. I think the title was a great choice, and repeating the first stanza was a great way to make the poem feel circular. I love the rhyming, and the part about "Daddy's credit cards". Good poem.

First of all, i like your poem style.

second, i like the reuse of the first stanza.

third, i like how you incorporated song lyrics in this poem, the nickelback line didn't see to flow as well.

Howeee Smack! I love the style of this and the message was sad but true. I work right in the middle of a bad part of town and one of the girls I went to school with whom was quite popular is now still quite popular walking front street and her life is nothing but thugs and drugs. Her teeth rotted from the meth. It is so sad the truth you have in this write. Awesome Job,
Kay