Lies

I lie to myself.
Every second of every day.
But my face still shows the pain,
even as I continue to say,

Naomi, I dont miss him.
Kaila, I know you.
I see it in your eyes.
Yes you do.

We are done,
and I'm all to blame.
I screwed up again and again,
But my feelings still stay the same.

I am talking to someone
But will he treat me right?
Will he hold my hair back when im sick?
Or will he make sure to call every night?

Will he love and cherish me?
Will he stick by me and never let go?
Will he choose me over drugs?
Will he always let his true feelings show?

Will he ever be like that guy?
That guy I have to lie about.
That guy that makes me miss him so much
I almost feel the need to shout

Naomi, I dont miss him.
Kaila, I know you,
I see it in your eyes.
Yes you do

I really dont know if he will ever be
But until I know for sure
I'ma lie to myself and everyone else,
But I cant seem to lie to her.

She knows exactly how I feel.
She can just tell.
she sees it in my eyes.
She just knows me all too well.