Suicide Note

I am sorry for being such a failure
I know how angry you are with me right now.
Hell you probably aren't even reading this
Considering you hate me with a burning passion.
I am just an undeserving failure
Who is good at nothing and can do nothing.
I will never live up to your image of a perfect child
I will always be your shame.
Your shadow that always seems you follow you
But when you turn around I am gone.
Gone to a place where you can never find me again.
I am just a no good loser who is terrible at life
And cannot be one of "them."
Just let me freeze to death
Or burn me at a stake
You can stab me
Beat me
Torture me as you will
For I deserve every last pain stricken moment.
How I long to just finish this and take the bloody knife
To plunge it in my heart.
Of course I know how much you'd love to see me do that,
Oh yes I know how much you want my death as much as I do.
But we can't get everything in life,
You of all people should know that.
It wouldn't matter if I died anyway
No one would miss me
No one would look for me
No one would care if they found my bloody mangled corps
Eaten by wild animals.
Instead you'd all have a party celebrating my death
And I won't even end up in heaven
Instead I'll be burning in hell.
I'm sure you feel so great that I'll be dead,
I'm sure you are because you always knew
That I was a stupid girl that was a failure at life.
So I say goodbye to you but I'd like to know one thing
Before I depart and leave you to cheer in triumph.
Are you happy now?