One or the Other?

Why am I still here?
Why are you still there?
Why is she by your side?
Why aren't I there instead?

One night and one more day.
Each pass without much progress.
Should I tell you or should i stay?
Should I walk toward you or turn away?

Too many decisions that need answers,
Are flooding me and drowning me too fast.
Am I waiting for disaster?
Its like a disease that just keeps getting faster.

Why am I still here?
Why are you still there?
Why is she by your side?
Why aren't I there instead?

Perhaps she is better for you.
I'm more like an outcast.
I have a troubled past.
One that I cannot share.

She is more simple.
Easy to deal with.
But if she gets bored.
I bare with you as you say:

"Why did she get bored?
Why didn't I choose her?
The one who was always there.
The one who wanted me genuinely."

But those same four questions remain.
Why am I still here?
Why are you still there?
Why is she by your side?
Why aren't I there instead?