Wow how very descriptive very smooth writing 5/5 maybe u can read one of mine.

Light a bulp in the dark

A prayer a wisper in the dark
falls on angels ears i know
they then fly with wings
to our side i know

An angle dies each time we lose hope
Each tear we cry an angles heart breaks
I have no proff of what i say
But hope an angle flies to you today

Your words were beautiful!

It rhymes very good..

It was a good poem.. It flowed nicely.. Just a suggestion to improve this.. try to use (.) =)

I'm still praying, Help me Lord,
^^I'm still praying, "Help me lord."

I really like your opening line.. It really grabs the readers attention.

TC.

I love this poem creativity and meaning were felt in it great job!!!5/5

laura

Wow..this is amazing... i think this is my favorite one of your poems.. you did an excellent job. i love it.5/5

It seemed a little broken to me. The rhyming was off which made it flow awkwardly. Some of the rhymes you used seemed like you just couldn't think of anything else to rhyme it with so you just made it work. Which you probably did, it happens to us all. 3.

I can definately see the improvement from your old poems to your new.
The rhyming and some lines in this seemed like you just added them in there because they kind of fitted, but they rhymed. That is the only thing that was wrong, everything else was perfect.
The flow was great, the vocab well suited and the concept great. I loved the first two lines, I think everyone can relate, I know I can. Life gets so repetitive sometimes.
An excellent job, I really enjoyed reading this one. :] 5/5

Tammie