I love this. Your imagery is amazing and the wording you used to describe the story fits well with it. The length at first sort of scared me, not gonna lie lol; but I found myself so easily pulled into your words, I was entertained with this from the beginning to the end. Quite enjoyed it.

5.5
:]
Heartchuu.

Wow... this is very dark and good.
My favorite verse was
"Weave intricate lies and scars of heart
Not one can help but believe
Quickening beats of a different dance
You're all alone within yourself
Go to sleep, you shallow soul"

It appears that you have written this with ease. I, myself, cannot write dark poetry; therefor, I give you big kuddos for writting this so wonderfully.

Nicely done.

--Sher

*applauds* (Bear with my comment, it's 7:19 a.m. and I haven't slept since Monday).
Umm, it was very intense...dark, powerful. It fits perfectly into this category. Your words flow beautifully from the tongue, and then take hands with the wind, spreading their darkness throught the reader's mind. Or, something like that.
I was absolutely astounded. You keep getting better. Am I jealous? Yes, I would say so.
It feels like you write this with ease.

Wow....that poem was amazing. Very well written...i give it 5/5. Well done keep up the good work

Absolutely amazing poem. You certainly portrayed the imagery clearly and creatively. Great write, 5/5

I absolutely love this kind of poetry. It's completly bone chilling, yet so intensly mind captivating.
Your poem was amazing.
The imagery was breath taking.
You are very talented.
I litterally felt like I was there experiencing the poem.

Amazing.
5/5 Elaine.

This was quite amazing, very dark and quite captivating. The imagery was great and made for a very powerful read. Not to mention your word choice was outstanding and made the piece unique and interesting, which is good considering the length. Let's just say I was never bored. :] Great read. 5/5

marcella

Im not really a great fan of drawn out poems, although it has some ability to entrance the reader. seems like a fair write to me. (:

Tom

Well it had to be written at midnight it kinda explains it hehe GREAT poem!! your choice of words was awesome! its very interesting, im not into dark poems about magic, but this one i gotta say captivated my attention. good job! keep writing! :)
dani!

I really enjoyed reading it...very nice work
keep it up ;)

This is like crazy good.... i really enjoyed reading this.. i love your choice of words,, it was amazing

Excellent!

honestly i can't relate to this, well i don't really write dark poetry..base on what i see, the word usage is great, the lines are deep and so imagery of thoughts!

keep it up!

What an awesome read. It took me on a journey, and was so strongly written that my heart started racing with each line. I will definetely read it again, and, probably, again, until I wrap all the meaning of the words into a story I can play out in my head. This was indeed an awesomely, transforming piece which I could say, I loved.

Nicely done, Danielle!

~Richhieeee

At first I thougt it was the woman being sacrificed. Very bitter... Satisfying in a sadistic sort of way. All I have to say for improvement is that in this context that its a 'rite'. ^^

C: This comment trading is good, ja? xD

It's nice i like it