If only, if only

Why do I put myself through this
It's a tragedy
and yet its a comedy

I like him so much
He puts a smile on my face
and a sparkle in my eyes
If only I knew how he felt about me
I probably never will

Just to know he likes me
would secure me forever

If only, if only
He is great, sweet, lovable, mysterious, intriguing
and yet he is
rude, a dream crusher, a heart-breaker, selfish and a liar

So why do I even bother if I know all these flaws
Because in all of me, in the pit of me
I feel one thing....
Hope

Hope for love
Hope for happiness
Hope for the world

If only, if only
If only I knew why he called her and not me
If only I knew why doesn't respond
If only it were like before
If only, if only

I just want him to tell me if I am wasting my time
I want to know everything about him
I want to be everything to him
But I guess that will never happen

If only, if only
If only I were prettier
If only I were skinnier
If only I were perfect

I like him ALOT
and if only he actually knew how much