It seems like everything is always my fault.
People are always yelling at me, telling me they cant trust me.
Only because all I do in life is screw up.
I'm just this big screw up.
It is just easier for me to take it and say OK or alright
I'm sorry.
Behind this smile is someone who cries all the time.
They think I'm this happy little girl, but really I feel like dying. I try to act like it doesn't matter and I don't care, I've got really good at it. But when i get home they don't know that I'm balling my eyes out and I just wish I was dead.
I wish that someone or something would just kill me by accident like I'm walking and someone shoots me.
This way my mother and father don't feel bad.
This way they don't feel ashamed that their daughter would kill them self. I do want to kill myself, but i couldn't do that to my mom and dad.
Nobody knows what goes on in my life.
Do those people know that their doing this to me?
Do they know that because of them, they make me want to just kill myself?
But most of all do you think if i told them they would even care, or just say god you bug me or your just like "her".
[I wonder]
