"Most cars on our roads have only one occupant, usually the driver."
- Carol Malia, BBC Anchorwoman

"How to store your baby walker: First, remove baby."
- Anonymous Manufacturer

"I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix."
-Dan Quayle

The word of the day is legs...
Lets go home and spread the word.

“Was it you or your brother who was killed in the war?” -- Reverend William Spooner.

A girl's legs are her best friends...but even the best of friends must part.

I never apologize.
I'm sorry, but that's just the way I am.

-Homer J. Simpson

It's so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don't say it.
--Sam Levenson

"Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty."
- Sign in Budapest Zoo

"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life." -- Brook Shields