“Illiterate? Write for help!” – Anonymous.

“Support bacteria. They’re the only culture some people have.” – Unknown.

M: The weirdest thing happened to me
C: Was it a dream where ur standing in sort of sungod robes on a pyramid & there were 100s of naked women screaming & throwing little pickles at u?
M: No...
C: Y m I the only 1 who has that dream?
Neal Israel

All the world's a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed.-Sean O'Casey

The invention of the teenager was a mistake. Once you identify a period of life in which people get to stay out late but don't have to pay taxes - naturally, nobody wants to live any other way.-Judith Martin, a.k.a. Miss Manners

What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death.-Dave Barry

Every time I try to define a perfectly stable person, I am appalled by the dullness of that person.-J.D. Griffin

TED:My orders came through My squadron ships out tomorrow Were bombing the storage depots at Daiquiri at 1800 hours Were coming in from the north below their radar
ELAINE:When will you be back?
TED:I cant tell you that. Its classified.
David Zucker

Yes, risk-taking is inherently failure-prone. Otherwise, it would be called sure-thing-taking.-Tim McMahon

To paraphrase Oedipus, Hamlet, Lear, and all those guys, "I wish I had known this some time ago."-Roger Zelazny