I just feel so fxckin stupid
i dont know how i could be so dumb
i need to wrap my heart up
before its too late and i get hurt.

He said why are you so troubled
i said theres so much about me
you just dont know
he said why wont you let me love you
i said im not someone you want to love.

Eating late doesnt give you nightmares each night
and the absence of sun doesnt strip away the light from ur life
its not the wind that grabbed your shoulder and threw you to the ground
no its not the rain that brings all the clouds.

No matter how hard i try,
i cant let anyone get close to me
emotionally.
i can only replace my love
with my body.
physically
in a failed attempt to find happiness
instantly.
and yeah it works, but only
momentarily.

Sometimes i just wanna fly away
just get up and run really, really far away
hold the tears back and fly
then get to my destination and cry
and breathe and leave
my past behind.

All these years ive been licking my wounds,
but they keep seeping deeper and deeper
every step i take
leads to heart break after heart break
what did i do to deserve the pain that ive endured?
i can only bear so much.

She's so troubled, she's so damaged
all her words are built off being hurt and anger
all the times she's cried
all the pain that fills her life
her mouth will never let her tell
but she needs to let it out
and she doesnt know how.

I dont know whats wrong with me
and i dont know why when i close my eyes your the one i see
& i know im just living a lie
trying to pretend im fine
when im not alright
i need you in my life

Trying to lie to myself
when really your the only one i want
trying to front like he's my everything
when your my dream
i just need to drop you
so i can get on with my life
stop playing with my emotions
just leave me alone
please

They say our wounds will heal with time,
but the pain grew worse, and more defined.