Never fear! Disasterpiece is here!
Though I'm beginning to think that's the reason you have fear in the first place...

Watch it pal... Or I'm gonna punch you in the feet..

If there's one thing I know... It's everything.

I want my own dictionary. It will be called "Webby D, Dictionary For Retarded White Rappers".

Did you ever notice how people sometimes say "It's funny because it's true?" The truth isn't always funny. Say you're morbidly obese, and I start laughing and calling you fat? What? It's funny, because it's true!

Why do little girls always want ponies for Christmas? Well, there is the ocassional effemanite little boy, but anyway. What? Do they think Santa is made of flipping ponies?

Whoever invented the lawnmower should be ashamed of themselves. Because of them, now there's a bunch of eight year old War Amps. Well, congratulations, because of you, Timmy can never feel a puppy humping his leg ever again!

Remember language arts class? You'd always have to make those "brain storms". I hated those so much. Because the best I could come up with was a "brain drizzle".

I never got along well in PDR in Grade 8. I would never, I repeat never, use the politically correct term for ANY of the body parts... Or what they do, for that matter.

I find it hard to leave people behind.. But harder to leave them forward... You could bump into them.

What? You don't get it? Yeah, me neither.