Life of a PnQ Poet - Kevin

Life of a PnQ Poet allows members of PnQ to interview the poet of the fortnight. Please keep your questions respectful and if the PnQ poet wishes to abstain from any questions, remember they may do so without explanation. Have fun and ask away!

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You all know him, either as a formidable adversary or stalwart comrade, he's made an impression on PnQ. Former moderator, active TC member, and owner of the biggest forehead... it's Kevin's 2 weeks to shine.

Check out his latest poem:

Genesis (how I learned about religions)
by Kevin

The white sheet upon a shape,
limitless in mystery.
Cities could and can reside there,
Elves may slumber sound beneath,
accounting for the pointy bits.

We circle and prod, take measures,
proclaim the end of days from angles,
perhaps decree that stains be demons
bare threads tell lessons,
Holy, be thy linen.

The shape beneath the white sheet,
limited by certainty.
Cities sprout from seeds above it,
tales of pointy eared immortals,
the fruit in the bowl hears all and chortles.

I'd like to thank the Academy, and my Gran..and, Jane for invading my dreams all too often.

Ah, that poem...i like it til the last line, which I couldn't make fit, so I just crapped it in there, awkward like a jigsaw puzzle piece that I forced into place..it's what I wanted to say, but not how I wanted to say it.

In any case, I look forward to being probed!

When you were little, were you the tallest kid in your class?

What kind of art do you like?

What is the point of poetry?

Are you a cat person or a dog person?

You wear briefs, don't you? You don't even have to answer, I just know. Boxer briefs at the outmost.

Sibby..I love when you tease me..ok..one post per woman!

When you were little, were you the tallest kid in your class?

No, I was really average height wise until I turned 16, then I sprouted up like a runner bean. Failure to thrive I think, but at 16 I got a great group of new friends, starting working and eating properly and just sort of bloomed...I also started writing poetry then, so maybe that is what made my so tall.

What kind of art do you like?

I like abstract art, where you make the image and connections, and I also have a soft spot for romanticism, probably due to my love of sci fi fantasy books, which introduced me to alot of artists. I don't have favourite artists though.

What is the point of poetry?

I'm still trying to work that one out love. For me, it's about getting confusing emotions, or interesting thoughts and questions out of my mind, and onto a page, where I can trap and study them. Objectivity. It's also nice to share them and make connections with people who read your words and hi5 you.
Are you a cat person or a dog person?

You wear briefs, don't you? You don't even have to answer, I just know. Boxer briefs at the outmost.

I wear boxers yes, and I have a pretty awesome collection..everything from tartan to sexy to thermal to leather. You know it.

Ok poetess, lets rumble....and you like my name? I always thought it sounded very plain and boring. I was meant to be called Seth, apparently.

what are your hobbies?

Stalking Sibby, playing drums and guitar and bass guitar ( I'm in two bands ) writing poetry when the mood takes me and won't let go....I do sword fighting...fencing and traditional european sword fighting. I like to read on trains and buses, I love going to the cinema alone (anti social I know, but I just prefer it)...and all the usual crap. I'm also a big geek, so I love me graphic novels, games and TV shows.
what are your favorite songs?

Right now I'm in love with a band called "Deerhoof". Check their song "perfect me". All time favourites...christ...well, according to my Ipon, my top 3 songs are

"dart for my sweetheart" by archie bronson outfit
"better living through Chemistry" by Queens of the Stoneage
"Boxing" by Ben Folds Five

But like all music fans, this question is impossible to answer.
what are your ambitions?

Ah, I'm not very ambitious, if you mean career wise. I never have been, despite being moderately talented. I want to record and release music and poetry, I want to train to be a counseller and work with young adults who are going through family problems, I want to own my own house...and just be happy.

what are your dreams?

I dream about Jane at least once a month...IE silvershoes TC..no I'm serious..I do.

Would you wear a toupee? Not like anyone can see up there anyway.

Are there different dialects in Scotland and if so, how would you describe yours?

Are you still playing in that band?

Would you go to a PnQ reunion if it was in the States?

What ONE scene can you remember from the pirate story?

I missed the cat and dog question...answer is neither, cause I have allegies!

Would you wear a toupee? Not like anyone can see up there anyway.

Har har. Well I still have a decent amount of hair, though my impressive spam makes it look like I'm going bald faster than a cat with mange, actually I'll probably still have a fringe at 40.

No, I won't wear a wig once it all goes, I'll just have hair like Doc from Back to the Future...crazy scientist out the sides style.

Are there different dialects in Scotland and if so, how would you describe yours?

There are, lots of them. Mines is a mix, sort of refined Edinburgh, which is alike a generalized Scottish accent, and old school Penicuik, which is a bit more traditional and hard core. I tend to swear in broad scots and talk about music in a sort of, Sean Connery polite Scottish accent.

Are you still playing in that band?

Well, I'm still with the dude from America, Micheal. We're recording online, so not playing gigs but still making music..I'll post a link soon. The other band, conflict diamonds is on a break, but I hear Pete is coming back to Edinburgh this july/august for the Fringe Festival. The Gods of ROck will smile upon us.

Would you go to a PnQ reunion if it was in the States?

Well, if I happened to be in the states at the time, I might drive for a few hours for it, but no way I'm dropping £600 just to watch you and Sibby and Abby make out.

Wait...pass me my credit card!

What ONE scene can you remember from the pirate story?

I remember it all darling. The dates where I was waiting in the strip club, then dragged Mo with a plane, the breast in my pocket, the jazz bar and the song, the fight under the water...I was there lady.

Oh good, Kevin. An outlet for my stalking.

What is your favorite poem? Favorite professional poet?
If you could alter only one decision you've made in your life, what would it be?
Did you watch the royal wedding?
Favorite color?
Name something quirky or odd about yourself (or that you can do) that you are proud of.
If you were a chair, what type of chair would you be and why.

You are stalking me Narph? Cool, the CLub is like a circle stalking club...aceness abounds.

What is your favorite poem? Favorite professional poet?

I actually made a thread about my favourite poet, William Soutar, which you can find in this very forum. I think I love his work more than I normally would because I love him, as an example of bravery and the triumph of the human spirit over suffering and depression.

In terms of my favourite poem, it's probably this one.

Alexander Pope

The Quiet Life
=========

Happy the man whose wish and care
A few paternal acres bound,
Content to breathe his native air
In his own ground.

Whose herds with milk, whose fields with bread,
Whose flocks supply him with attire;
Whose trees in summer yield him shade,
In winter fire.

Blest who can unconcern'dly find
Hours, days, and years slide soft away
In health of body, peace of mind,
Quiet by day,

Sound sleep by night; study and ease
Together mixt, sweet recreation,
And innocence, which most does please
With meditation.

Thus let me live, unseen, unknown;
Thus unlamented let me die;
Steal from the world, and not a stone
Tell where I lie.

If you could alter only one decision you've made in your life, what would it be?

I would have tried harder in school and went to college at a younger age. I've worked had not to regret things like that though, but yeah.

Did you watch the royal wedding?

No. I'm ashamed we still have a royal family. They are workshy benifits theives.

Favorite color?

Dark Purple, obviously.

Name something quirky or odd about yourself (or that you can do) that you are proud of.

I was inclined to say I do an impression of Gollum from Lord of the Rings that will raise the hairs on the back of your neck..but that isn't odd. When I walk around the streets and I see someone who looks really troubled I often imagine then at their best in my minds eye and sort of, push that thought at them. It's an old occult habit I picked up in my teens that I happen to think is utterly harmless and positive, but I still do it. On some level I hope it gets to them, but it's odd.

If you were a chair, what type of chair would you be and why.

Oh Narph, for you I'd be an easy chair to curl up in and read...kinda ratty and old, but comfortable.

Poetess...you have to get all serious eh?

what do you fear? do you fear animals as I do? do you fear death?

I'm too young to fear death, never had any serious contact with it until recently. My Gran passed away in hospital and I was there with her. It was absolutely terrifying to see her body just become dead and empty...and there are things about someone dying they don't tell you..things I won't write here.

On a personal level though, I do worry that if my circumstances change for the worse, say I lose my job and my home, that I'll turn into the kind of person my Mother and Father were. Not to speak ill of them, but they had serious issues, mostly around alcohol and it ruined their lives. I'm so far removed from that right now, but there are other people in my family who've had bad luck and went really dark really quickly. It's almost like we have some genetic weakness in us...that scares me.

Is Kevin my real name though? Do I really look like that? I just watched an amazing film called "catfish" where a bored housewife from the USA invents a whole family, makes facebook accounts for them all and proceeds to have various online relationships with them and it only stops when one chap tracks her down, thinking she is an 8 year old art genius who has been painting his photographs.

Is Kevin your real name?
Do you think you look like a Kevin?

Does this ratty old chair have spare change under the cushion? Approximately how much, would you say?
The quirk sounds good, Kevs. Although I picture you doing it with bright blue pulsating lazer beams coming out of your eyes, which would likely scare the person out of their moping anyway. But that's pretty cool, too.

Do you wear slippers? Describe them and how they relate to your personality.

Is Kevin your real name?

In Moscow, the winters are cold and long, comrade.

Do you think you look like a Kevin?

I look like a Kevin on the inside. The name Kevin means "fair of face", so as the late and great Carl Sagan was found of saying;

"I'll let you decide"

Does this ratty old chair have spare change under the cushion? Approximately how much, would you say?

You foxy little minx, are you asking if I have the emotional depth to date someone as mentally challenging as you? Are you hitting on me in a subtle way? Yes, there is change in the chair, but it's all stuck together with bluetak, so if you want the money you have to work a bit for it.

£1.34..in shiny coppers.

Do you wear slippers? Describe them and how they relate to your personality.

I was afraid this question would come up. Yes I do, but they are like little fluffy boots with bobble tassles, kinda like a goth christmas elf would wear. My girlfriend bought me them as a joke, and I fell in love with them for plodding around the house.

Don't think less of me.

In Moscow, the winters are cold and long, comrade.

^^ Is that a quote from Orwell's 1984? I'm reading it right now.

Have you ever seen things in the night sky you could not explain? Have you ever seen under Abby's skirt? Have you ever wanted to know it's all; The Universe! Are there Angels Kevin and are there Demons. Is their Christ real? Would you bow to a Antichrist? Could you drum the steps of Jericho's falling? I found your pic quite dashing! Does that make me Odd, Boyfriend?

Kevin,

Would you say that we are in a kind of "Social Movement" in our generation today (a movement similar to the Scholasticisms, Industrial, Scientific, etc) and that the owner of facebook, Mark Zuckerberg, is one of its proponents? Also, how significant and or/ harming is this rapid growth of Social movement these days towards a species aiming for progress. Since, this social movement quickens trasactions, and develop quicker and well-knowledge thinkers.

Lets get to the work...OK Edward

Have you ever seen things in the night sky you could not explain? No, not with some research

Have you ever seen under Abby's skirt? Not yet comrade, but hope springs eternal.

Have you ever wanted to know it's all; The Universe! Well, I used to, but then I got to thinking how utterly boring it would be to know everything, as I know some things and I'm already burdened!

Are there Angels Kevin and are there Demons. No darling, except the human kind.
Is their Christ real? I don't think so.
Would you bow to a Antichrist? Would I have a choice?
Could you drum the steps of Jericho's falling? I can drum to anything, though I'm not sure I'd want too.
I found your pic quite dashing! Does that make me Odd, Boyfriend? No, you're only human.

Hey ABC, nice question.

I think every generation is part of a social movement, usually bundled up into the decade they were young. The 60's had their social movement towards freedom and expression, the 70's towards rights and experimentation...god knows what the 80's was and I missed most of the 90's.

I think now, our generation is in the movement of absolute knowledge. They say that back in the day, public libraries gave the common person power to self educate. That has been fully taken over by the internet. Anyone with access to a computer can learn ancient yoga, cooking, read any book/poem/essay or publish their own. It's the age of freedom of information and I'm still not sure what effect it will have on us, or the children growing up with it.

Mark Zuckerberg is a just a cog in the wheel. Facebook might be the most well known, but he wasn't the first to do what he did, he just did it better than anyone else.

I think, if there is any danger from this movement of information, it will be that we just don't have time to adjust to it, psychologically. Keep in mind, 100 years ago, we had nothing more complex than a steam engine. Now, if you think about how technology and information progresses in 100 years, you'll understand that not only does it get more complex, but the rate at which is gets more complex increases and increases.

The next 100 years will equal 1000 years of technological advancement, which is sobering and amazing.

The slippers... I knew it. No, Kevin, I'm just broke and my only source of income (and food, sometimes) seems to be furniture leftovers.
You can get as metaphorical with all that as you want. :)

What do you think of the indigenous societies or clans that still exist in remote parts of the world, particularly, should the rest of the world take action against some of their dangerous rituals and provide them with a means for joining the "learned" world, or should they be left alone entirely?

Favorite stuffed animal/childhood comfort item, and do you still have it?

I think we should leave indigenous people well alone, unless of course they are violating their own populations most basic humans rites, even then you dip your toes in the murky waters of value judgements and sociological issues you could get lost in.

I think if rape, murder or child abuse is going on, something should be done, aside from that, leave well alone.

Favorite stuffed animal/childhood comfort item, and do you still have it?

It was a bagminton racket, and no I don't still have it cause it was one of those old wooden ones. It was a sword, a stone hitter, a guitar and an actual racket. I loved that thing..and yes, i grew up very poor.

Interesting answer, Kev. I agree with you on that one.

Something simple: What, in your opinion, is the funniest joke you've ever delivered to a person? Please share it. :)

Kevin - I had a pair of fuzzy ankle-height slippers with puffball toggles on them. They were white. I wore them constantly when I was in Ireland because my apartment was cold and clammy all the time (should have seen that one coming). They got abandoned there, and I have yet to find their equal.

I'm surprised that you wear boxers.

Questions:

Do you do anything visual-artsy? If no, what's the first thing you'd want to try?

You are being forced into a time machine with a one-way ticket to any decade of the 1900's. Which decade do you choose? Is it different if it's a round-trip ticket?

In your opinion, what kind of non-human primate is the creepiest?

Can you post the youtube video of you making a snow penis again?

What is your first recallable memory?

Is recallable a word?

Would you rather be a shepherd or a wolf?

What am I wearing right now?

Do you prefer to stalk or be stalked?

We're peas in a pod ABC.

Ok, best joke..well, here goes but not alot of people get this.

A man walks into a fish mongers (don't know what you call em in the USA, a shop that sells only fresh fish) with a massive still alive Salmon under his arm. The fish monger stares at him, and then the fish and then back at the man, utterly puzzled.

"what can i get you?" he says.

"I'll have a fish pie please" replies the customer. The fish monger raises a confused eyebrow, glances once more at the still alive salmon under the customers arm, then back at the man.

"Isn't that....isn't that a bit unfair on your fish?"

The customer frowns, then smiles down at his Salmon, and wiggles it's head from side to side, smiling.

"oh...but it's his birthday!"

Sibby!

Do you do anything visual-artsy? If no, what's the first thing you'd want to try?

I don't do anything visual-artsy, you know I'm more of a musician. I did however draw several comics when I was in high school with my good friend Chrissy. They were, well crap but good fun. I've been toying with the idea of doing an adult graphic novel, in the style and manner of Alan Moore, who did Watchman and From Hell.

You are being forced into a time machine with a one-way ticket to any decade of the 1900's. Which decade do you choose? Is it different if it's a round-trip ticket?

Oh, I'd go back to the 1980's and sort my family out, nuff said.

In your opinion, what kind of non-human primate is the creepiest?

The one with the massive non hairy arse..I forget what it's called, but you can tell it knows it looks utterly stupid. It has these huge testicle things on it's arse...ugh.

Can you post the youtube video of you making a snow penis again?

ugh...ok..I want it stated for the record this video isn't for kids, and I'm super annoyed my girlfriend stopped filming because just as it ends I did a cool sideways flip and made a snow angel...aaawww

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XwAm8WYhdH0

What is your first recallable memory?

I have a massive collection of memories from before i was 2 and a half (which is the age I was brought to Scotland). I don't know which one is the earliest, no timeline but I recall not being able to walk in a few of them, so it would have to be lying on a white fur rug staring at an open fire. I don't think I was able to stand up, and I think I was just grabbing the fur and rolling around.

Is recallable a word?

I understood it's function. Yes it is.

Would you rather be a shepherd or a wolf?

Even if I was a wolf, I'd still be a shepard of my fellow wolves, cause I'm a natural leader yo!

What am I wearing right now?

Oh Sibby, were it not for the PG13 rating on this website! No ok, I'd say a pair of ratty old jeans that you love and a white shirt, with slippers.

Top 3 favorite novels.

Are you thinking of a baboon? They have red hairless butts, and are definitely up there on the creepiness list, in my opinion.

Where were you before Scotland?

Hey ABC.

1. Vernon God little by DBC Pierre
2. Illusions by Richard Bach
3. The Pillars of the earth by Ken Follet

And Sibby, I was born in Littleborough, which is a part of Rochdale. A quaint little town/village that looks like it's a seaside resort, but isn't. I went back there a few years ago..lovely.

Chocolate or vanilla?

Such creative questions. Way to one up me guys, haha.

Dear Kevin,

Do you like to be called Kevin or is there another name you prefer to answer by?

Do you have any siblings?

If you could be any animal what kind of animal would you be and why?

What would you do if you won a million dollars? And would you split it with me, haha?

Have you ever flown in an airplane, if so where? Where would you like to travel someday?

What do you do for a living?

What is your most treasured item?

What do you treasure most in life?

What do you like to do in your spare time?

Who do you admire and why?

What is your favorite meal of the day: Breakfast, dinner, supper or other?

What are your strengths? Your weakness?

What is your guilty pleasure?

What are you most known for?

What is the craziest thing you've ever done?

How many fingers am I holding up?

I will end my "interrogation" here before I get carpel tunnel, haha.

Chocolate Janey jane, vanilla is like melted milk to me...or, just milk..thick milk...eeeewww

Wow...talk about spanish inquisition!...lets get rocking!

Do you like to be called Kevin or is there another name you prefer to answer by?

Some of my friends call me "murraymint" which is a scottish sweetie, and my second name is Murray. I don't like abreviated names, so Kevin is fine. Cosmic was an old nickname, from my hippy stoner days.

Do you have any siblings?

One brother and 2 half sisters, all of them nuts and younger than me.

If you could be any animal what kind of animal would you be and why?

A monkey, obviously.

What would you do if you won a million dollars? And would you split it with me, haha?

Buy a house, built a recording studio for my music in the basement and record local bands for free...and travel around the world, collecting badges, lovers and stamps.

Have you ever flown in an airplane, if so where? Where would you like to travel someday?

I've been all over, and it's been all over me. China, Denmark, spain, Poland, Italy, Cyprus, USA and this year, maybe back to China/Aus.

I wanna see Australia/new zealand, got family and friends there.

What do you do for a living?

I work with adults who have autism, or they work with me..I'm not sure.

What is your most treasured item?

My body.

What do you treasure most in life?

My good lady, Agata.

What do you like to do in your spare time?

I love charity shopping around Edinburgh with my Ipod blaring..I love good movies and books, fine foods and wines, dancing, playing drums and guitar...em, poetry..occasionally..and watching youtube discussions about important issues.

Who do you admire and why?

I don't give out admiration easily, perhaps I need to feel I know someone personally before that emotional reaction comes. Bill Hicks, the late and great comedian, for staying true to his art despite knowing he was dying and taking alot of flak for it, William Soutar (see this forum for my thread about him) a poet who was bedridden but never lost his love for humanity and nature...mostly folks who are dead

What is your favorite meal of the day: Breakfast, dinner, supper or other?

Early dinner, around 4pm...

What are your strengths? Your weakness?

I'm very observant, good at making links to solve problems and I have a rather amazing ability to ignore the kinds of situations that would cripple other people with stress....it usually hits me days or so later..but it's handy.

my weaknesses are pretty common. I'm a bit aloof, distracted and self centered.

What is your guilty pleasure?

hmm, I don't really have any that I feel guilty about. Maybe computer games. I like really high quality well scripted PC RPG games like Elder scrolls and Mass Effect...games with epic stories that are on par with the best movies. I only feel guilty if I stay up really late playing em...my poor girlfriend..

What are you most known for?

Around Edinburgh, definately my music, and drumming in particular. With my friends, well for being a bit nuts and coming out with ideas and comments that are off the charts.

What is the craziest thing you've ever done?

I took part in a primetime BBC television show called "the experiment", which you can youtube. I was a prisoner in a custom made prison in london. It was a remake of the famous stanford prison experiment of the 70's. Anyone who has studied pyschology will know what I mean.

How many fingers am I holding up?

10

phew....that was intense!

What has been your most pivotal moment in life so far?

Biggest chance you have ever taken?

If you could add or remove one emotion for all of humanity, what would it be and why?

What spawned your interest in music?

What did you like the most about Kahlil Gibran's "The Prophet" ?

Hey Beautiful.....chaos.: )

My most pivotal moment...aside from my birth? I have never had one of those hero moments where I make one decision and it changes everything. I had a year from the age of 19 to 20 where I was a hermit, self imposed. It's when I started writing and reading poetry seriously and had a mid life crisis...at 19. When I emerged out of that, I suppose that was a huge moment.

Biggest chance you have ever taken?

telling the woman I'm with now exactly how I feel about her.

If you could add or remove one emotion for all of humanity, what would it be and why?

I thought about this for a long time and decided I wouldn't remove any emotion from humanity, except maybe stress which is I hear, from counsellers the most common and damaging emotion for everyday people on a daily basis.

What spawned your interest in music?

Loving music, as a listener at first. Then wanting to emulate the artists I loved a youngster. Being naturally quick at learning instruments helps, as it made it fun and rewarding. Later it became more about expressing myself and being social.

I loved everything about "the prophet". I read it the first time when I was given it by a woman who I'd just started dating. Like all books, certain parts still stick in my mind, and have become utterly linked with my understanding of certain subjects.

The section where he speaks about happiness and suffering is pure gold.

Getting a bit sick of you quoting it in every thread though..old chap...: )

Would you like to control everything posted on this site?

Poems&Quotes?

Can you say all of that with a Scottish accent please? It's one of my favorites lol

Which artists were you looking to emulate when you were a youngster?

No Micheal, I don't want control, just influence. : )

Beautiful...well the first band I ever heard that made me think "wow this is...music!" was Queen, which explains alot. I then moved onto the doors, nirvana and radiohead...pretty standard stuff for a teeny bopper.

Kevin, do you feel super popular?

Hey Poetess...

Dark Purple is my fav colour, obviously.

I don't like James Blunt's music, though I hear the man himself lives in Ibiza...so, he must be a wronger.

And yes Jane, I feel rather chuffed. I didn't think anyone would ask much of anything seeing as the CLUB folks know all my dirty secrets anyway, and I'm not much for commenting on poetry...