*****Musicality's Contest #4******

The Suicide Act
by Alyson

I walk down a dark hallway
And look all around
I glance at the floor
Theres blood on the ground

I continue to walk
Never missing a step
I continue to think of
All the secrets they kept

I'm stumbling along know
I don't know where to go
I look at my arms
And the stories they show

I'm following the blood trail
It ends at a room
Don't want to go in there
It feels to much like doom

I take a breath now
I open the door
The sight before me
Causes the tears to pour

I don't know whats happening
That can't be me
I open my mouth
Desperately trying to scream

Theres blood on the bed
And blood on the floor
I'm on the bed
I can see from the door

I glance at my arms
How transparent they look
Then I look at the bed
The life that I took

The tears come harder
I sink to the floor
I glance at my body
Then run out the door

I never stop running
I never glance back
Forever I'm part of
The Suicide Act

The Cave
by ruby

There is a cave on a far off shore
Which gapes out across an unknown sea
A great mouth eternally hungry
The maw of a monster yearning to pull free

Mottled grey are the rocks of the cliff face
From which the cave's entrance yawns
Inside, stalagmites and stalactites
Grow in mysterious threatening forms

Inside the cave it is black as pitch
Except for an eerie phosphorescent glow
That illuminates a deep underground lake
How deep that water is nobody knows

At dusk a sea nymph rises from the water
Her perfect body as clear as glass
Her voice as she sings is heavenly sweet
No human who hears can get past

Bones lie at the bottom of the black pool
Of men she lured in with her song
who drowned as they tried to reach her
the lust inside too strong

Beyond the nymph's glassy black lake
Beyond the cave floor, black and hard
at the back of this cave full of malice
Lies a host of wreaks, a ships grave yard

Such is the fate to all who wander
Into this forgotten ocean grave
Whether by nymph or craggy rock
None will ever leave the cave.

"Everything perfection defines"

I`m so fortunate
To have your love
You`re truly a godsend
That fell from above

You mean everything to me
Without you I`d merely fall apart
So given to you on a silver platter
Is my love laced heart

I need you more then you know
Your lips are an addiction
I long to be with you
As your touch is temptation

When together, I love the way you . . .
Hold me tight in your warm embrace
Kiss me gentle with your softened lips
And all the things that make my heart race

As you whisper sweet nothings
Lightly into my ear
I fall into the sky
And my worries disappear

You have a smile that`s priceless
Eyes that say a million I love yous
And a heart truly sincere
With a love that no girl could refuse

I could go on forever
About why I love you
There are a million and one reasons
And those are just a few

In my eyes and in my heart
You`re everything perfection defines
No need to think outside the box
Or read between the lines

To see how great you are . . .

write a secret scream

Write what you have not the words to say,
give your writing strength,
vent all you feel within,
let loose your emotions,
safely and secretly,
none have to know of what you write,
no one has to know what you feel,
express yourself onto paper,
let your emotions run free,
let it be your silent scream,
your secret cry,
an outlet for all you feel,
see part of yourself in the ink,
let it out,
allow it to be free,
no one has to know what you write,
they don't need to know what it means,
just that it sets part of you free,
becomes your sole form of expression,
when hope is all but gone,
so write down what you feel,
allow it to be your secret cry.

In My Dreams
by Sarah Drew

I fall asleep
I start to dream
My thoughts are deep

I see him there
He walks over to me
He runs his fingers through my hair

He looks into my eyes
I look back into his
My heart flies

He smiles at me
And kisses my cheek
I'm filled up with glee

He takes my hand
We begin to walk
We here music from a distant band

It's beginning to become light
Our time together is almost over
I'm filled with fright

He smiles and says goodbye
He walks away from me
I begin to cry

Our time is done
It's all over for me
That's it for all the fun

I'm now awake
Tears are rolling down my face
I begin to shake

It's over now
I'll get over this dream
I just don't know how

I am sorry I have not been perfect,
During my eighteen years of life.
I am sorry you think I am anorexic,
And that I live life by a knife.
I am sorry I am not the same little girl,
That I was a short time ago.
I am sorry that I feel so much pain inside,
And that you have yet to see me grow.
I am sorry you must look into these cold eyes,
And that I have no confidence left to spare.
I am sorry that I like being away from you,
And that you hate the clothes I wear.
I am sorry for keeping things from you,
And for all my self-destruction.
I am sorry for making you yell at me,
And for causing you have that reaction.
I am sorry for all the times I have sided with Dad,
And for not feeling a bit of guilt.
I am sorry for being the reason you damaged,
The relationship we could have built.
I am sorry for using your best kitchen knife,
To slit my wrist for the first time.
I am sorry for making time spent with me,
Have to feel like a crime.
I am sorry for not giving you hugs when you want them,
And I am sorry for resenting you.
I am sorry for not having the same beliefs,
And for always making you argue.
I am sorry I do not like you,
And that I cannot forget things you have said.
I am sorry that each and every day,
Those words go through my head.
I am sorry for never calling,
And that I do not miss you at all.
I am sorry you had to see me at my worst,
Sorry you had to see me fall.
I am sorry I am not the perfect daughter,
And that I am not who you thought I would be.
I am sorry, mother, for letting you down,
I am so sorry for being me.

The Fight that Changed our Lives

I hear the yelling and screaming
I feel the vibrations of the banging
I hear the screams of bad words coming
From your mouth
I hear you say I am leaving and not coming back
You cant leave just like that you have kids
What are you going to do for the kids?
How do you think we will feel?
Bet you dont even care
Care that I am hear crying
Care that you are about to walk out of 4 different
Kids life
But you didnt even think that we needed you
That we loved you
You leave with out saying bye
Hear I am the oldest child
Your first daughter
Crying cause you are walking out my life
Then you see me running after you
Yelling mommy dont leave please dont leave me
You stop and say Jenn I love you and all your brothers and sisters
Dont forget that
You drive off and just leave me crying
Do you really love me?
Cause if you did you will not have left me
Now hear I am and Im needing a mom
We all need a mom
How is Gillian and Chloe going to grow up?
With out a mom to go to
Am I supposed to take that role?
The role of a mother when I am not ready
I walk back in the house and I look at daddy
I see he is crying just sitting on the sofa and crying
I bet you did not even know that this man loved you
Loved you enough that the next thing I know is that
He was getting in the car coming after you
That day you did not come back
But please do know that he is still looking
Looking for you; he has not stopped and its been
Over a year
Mom where ever you are he wont stop looking for you
Mom you were wrong to leave I was not ready for this mother job
I was not ready to be on my own with out a mother
You were wrong when you said that dad did not love you
He does love you and thats why he is out till this day looking for you
Mom we all love and miss you and we all hate that you left but we all
Forgave you so please come back come back for the kids come back for dad
Do it for the family I dont want the role of a mother when I am still in need
For a mother and Gillian and Chloe including me needs our real mother around
We need you mom cant you see that we all miss and love and forgave you for leaving but now we need you around I hope you see this poem because its coming from my hart and all I can say now is
PLEASE COME BACK WE NEED YOU

Disease
by Dean Rands

It tears me apart to say the words
To think the truth for just a second
Because then it's real - not a lie
And I'll have no choice but to forever cry

But still it's something I must face
And I must fight - win or lose
Because it's there - inside of me
Hidden in my skin - hard to see

I'm truly scared of what could be
Of what lurks beneath my skin
It may be hard for you to know
Thats because I cover it with a show

No one knew of my horrid secret
The thing I dreaded most
And then you appeared - came along
And spoke to me with hope's song

The lyrics came so loud and clear
Hold on, be strong, have hope
For that reason I trusted you
And that trust just grew and grew

I dont know where to next or if
This battle I will win
But you're here to keep me strong
And forever remind me or hope's song

I've said before how scared I am
How hope is hard for me to keep
But this I'll face just for you
My friend, my hero - It's true

I hear the clock as it slowly ticks
Shows me how time goes by
So not a minute should we waste
Let's get this over with - post haste

And if the news is really bad
I won't cry or break down
I'll fight it all the way
So next time I can save YOUR day

Sitting here
Screaming inside
Trying to find a way to escape
Waiting for a light to shine through
Something..Someone..to tell her everything will be ok...
What if no one comes?
Will she make it through the day?
She sits in this dark room
With a knife in her hand
Ready to take her life away
Ready to leave this madness
Leave all her sadness behind
The time has come
No one is here
It's time for her to face her fear
She lifts the knife
Slit's her wrist
Knowing that she won't be missed
Blood starts flowing
Her face begins glowing
Death she's face's head on
Hoping that it will help her move on
Lifeless she is on the floor
The door creaks upon
Walks in a little girl
Mommy she's whispers
Are you okay?
Mommy talk to me
Tell me you all right
The girl notices a note on the door
Reads it quickley then falls on the floor
Mommy how could you do this to me?
Leave me all alone...
Who is gonna be there now that you're gone
I'm sorry mommy that you thought I didn't care....
I guess....life just isn't fair....

Silent one
by Just-take-my-heart-i-want-you-to-have-it

Silent one, why don't you speak?
is it the darkness you wish to seek?

no I've been there, saw it all
i have a voice it lies where darkness falls

oh silent one why don't you cry
cry for your loved ones that will all soon die

no, i can't for it is i
that kills the loved and leave them to die

silent one why don't you love
love like an angel from up above

no love, for no love will i give
for i am death that kills to live

oh silent one why don't you sleep
sleep in the night to see the day weep

no i can't for if i do
i will see that love is so very true

silent one why do you call
call me to my dark, scary hall

no you must come
when i leave you'll be numb

oh silent one why must i die
to die by your hand will bring a joyful cry

no you will die and join me
so just let go and do not plea

An Angels touch
by Randy East

I sense your presence near me
Yet I seem to be alone
Running through the darkness
On a long and weathered road

The obstacles prove ruthless
And the trees begin to thicken
An unseen rock impales my pace
And downward I am stricken

Eyes colliding toward the earth
I brace to take the blow
But the ground gave way before me
And I break into a hole

Struggling for composure
Not a second to react
I fall through the abyss
And await the harsh impact

I woke a moment later
With a ringing in my head
The darkness all about me
How could I not be dead?

I rolled up off my back
And abruptly tried to stand
but my legs gave to the earth
I was sinking in the sand

I yelled for you repeatedly
And looked into the air
Your essence all around me
Yet you didn't seem to care

How can you feel so close
And yet be so far away
I would think if you were near to me
You wouldn't turn away

I know that you are out there
You can save me if you tried
Why when I need you most
Would you run away and hide

I watched in horror as my chest
Got sucked in by the land
But the sinking of my heart
Was now quicker than the sand

I knew that it was over
And that soon I would be dead
So in last attempt I made a wish
As the sand reached past my head

While the last bit of my body
Was being swallowed by the tangle
I whispered, Heavenly Father
Please send to me an angel

Hoping that the Lord
Would hear one of my pleas
A warmness engulfed my hand
And I felt a sudden squeeze

In a blinding rush of speed
As my mind let out a scream
I jerked upright in bed
And awakened from my dream

I looked over to see you sleeping
In your cool and solemn grace
Unaware of me in the darkness
sweat pouring down my face

I gazed downward at my side
Still shaken by the sand
And realized that in this nightmare
We were always holding hands

It wasn't but a moment
When I saw you come awake
Roll over toward my side
And give me a gentle shake

I looked into your soft blue eyes
As you neared my face with ease
You kissed me on the lips and said
The Lord told me to squeeze

Secret Code (revised 1/18/06)

I walk along these empty streets
Looking up at the cold, gray sky
Dreaming all but empty dreams
Doing this, I begin to cry

My soul is bleak
No one flashes me a glance
Why am I so meek?
When will I have my chance?

My eyes are glazed
My body seems hollow
I'm stuck in a maze
That I'm doomed to follow

My heart has cracked
This life is forlorn
Loving has been something I've lacked
I shall forever mourn

Does he love me?
Will he ever come around?
Can I ever make him see?
Am I even being sound?

He always makes me smile
He inspired me to write
Maybe I'm in denial
But he made me believe in love at first sight

He's like music playing in my head
I try to go on with the day
But I think of him instead
And when I'm around him, I never know what to say

I think back to the past,
To all the fun we had
I wish those days could last
Forever, so I'm never sad

My life is one big dream
I am lost and never found
And if I should scream
Would it even make a sound?

So I walk along this road
I shouldn't fret or pout
For love must be some secret code
I can't quite figure out

=)