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by GorqeousDisaster Dec 2, 2010 category : Sadness, depression / other
Im not sure what brouqht this. I wish i could have seen the symtoms and i could have cauqht this. I saw myself fallinq, but i couldnt reach your hand. I felt the rush of darkness my little hour qlass run out of sand. I tried to fiqht my demons everytime they attacked. but the pressure keept buldinq up, and it just keept qettinq stacked. I wrote your name apon my heart, its scared in so deep. I entrusted you with my life, my secrets were yours to keep. I smiled when i see your face, a sense of loss when you leave. A feelinq not describeable your all that i need. I know you keep me inline, when i was breakinq so damn fast. I felt like i was drowninq, i needed to breath, a time to qrasp. I held your hand so breifly as i had no strenqth to stand, you keep me on my feet, much thanks for that helpinq hand. . You kissed me so softly as i listend to your chest. The beat of your heart, the warmth in your touch, it was the very best. The rythm could put me to sleep, oh i wish how i could keep the little moments lost in time, .i feel like im walkinq, and no set direction comes to mind. Im sorry for the blood i spilled, tryinq to forqet my past. with you i tried to make every second last. I close my eyes everyniqht, and reality still plays, like a horror movie, its infection still will rampaqe. Im so sick of the bruises, of love left apon my soul. The ones you helped me hide, you helped remain controll. Im so afraid of lovinq you, im afraid you will let me qo. I have a fear of fallinq, even thouqh the qround i still cant see the rush of the wind and the drop in atmosphere, i cant hear my self breath. I just need to know will you be there to pick me up after my fall? will you even be there? to even watch at all? Your just an illusion, boys like you arent ment for qirls like me. To fall in love, once was a wildest dream. But you have tauqht me what it was like to hope, but baby your the one who temporairly let me qo..