A Silent Suicidal Note

My last words to the world
To the people who might care
The note of my pain and hurt
The last letters of my despair

I don't want to die silently
And never let it all be read
The pain inside my heart
All the things i never said

I suppose i should think I'm lucky
I had my family there along the way
When my life was going down hill
They were there each and every day

But all the hugs never cured me
Never magically appeared a smile
Because a broken heart doesn't leave
Never leaves you for the while

I didn't die because of that boy
But all the hurt in my past
The way one day it all disappeared
My teenage hood went fast

In all what seems like seconds
But more like an eternity or two
I had my heart ripped out
Then raped by your best bud too

I tried to hide it all
And never tell a living soul
But the tears flowed freely
From my open deep dark whole

To all the ones who loved me
And said that i would find a way out
I promise you guys i really tried
Didn't you hear me scream or shout

I thought i would get better
That the tears would wash away
But that just never happened
So heres all i have to say

Goodbye to my loving mother
Always know that i loved you
You were my voice when i was silent
And i know you felt it too

Goodbye to my 4 brothers
Ill be watching you from above
From the youngest to the oldest
I give you my ever lasting love

Goodbye to my father
You always watched over me
Now its my turn too watch
One day maybe you will see

Finally goodbye to everyone
The people i have missed
From my bes-test friend
To that guy i used to kiss

Hear my words and catch them
Oneida they'll all come true
My love rather then pain etched in time
Because i didn't know what to do

Goodbye to everyone i love
ill now be watching down
For everyone who touched my heart
Please don't wear that frown

Now I'm so happy in heaven
Something earth didn't give me
But i wish yous all the best
With your love you set me free