Some reminders that romance is possible

I am feeling kind of hopeless right now - feeling like I am not sure what love means or feels like anymore. This is making having faith and keeping up with my long-distance relationship with my partners very strained.

So, I wanted to ask about and solicit positive/warm/inspiring feelings you are feeling about love. I want to get back to the place where love is beautiful, and worth fighting for.

Ditto..

But I'm not giving up so easily on love. I want to feel that warmth from someone that loves me for being me and loves only me. To be there again would be so blissful and makes my sadness turn to happiness because I know one (maybe not soon) I will be in that place again.

Never give up hope (hugs)

You should let love find you.

You're wasting your time.

Love, the right love, is SO worth fighting for! It's forgiving and gracious and powerful and emotional and comfortable and uncomfortable and precious and frustrating and beautiful and gentle and oh my goodness gracious, it's so so so worth it.

Realizing that love, any love, is two people who have been raised and shaped very differently, no matter the commonalities, coming together and it's never easy. I always thought if you found the right person, it should be easy -- it's NOT. It's hard work. And you have to be willing to sacrifice yourself and lose your right to be right sometimes -- as should they. It builds you up and breaks you down because all your eggs are in their basket and that's terrifying.

BUT.

Your happiness is not, and never should be, attached to another person. If you attached your happiness onto someone else, it creates a hopelessness, an instability, and an unfair burden on their shoulders. It creates high expectations that'll always let you down.

<3

The older I get the more I believe intimacy (at least in my case) leads to self actualisation like nothing else.

However it doesn't need to be a lover per say: friends, family, pets all provide a level of intimacy. I didn't have a partner for some years because my friends were so amazing I didn't feel the need (or have the time) for anyone else.

I'd given up searching for a significant other until I decided to actually meet someone from Tinder and turns out he is a genuine romantic, sweetheart, etc. we did all of those lovely things like candle lit dinners with vinyl records playing, midnight walks down through the city streets with a bottle of wine, swimming in lakes etc. And best of all: he never projected his insecurities or negativity (that we all have) on to me - something I've suffered from with every lover in the past.

And just as quickly has it came, it left. I had to move cities as our careers pulled us away from each other. It will come again, as it has in the past, if you're open to it but not expecting it.

A few quotes I draw from when I feel as you do:

"The best times to show true love are when it isn't easy and it requires personal sacrifice."

"Unconditional love can open doors you once thought were forever closed."

"We have a good marriage (relationship). Just because it is good, that doesn't mean it's not hard. When it is hard, that doesn't mean it's not good."

Please someone show me love is real...

I believe that love does really exist but if you look too hard for it you won't find it

First decide exactly what you want in your perfect soul mate. Then stop looking for him. Get on with your life, go out and have fun with friends with no intention of settling down or looking for love. If it turns up and it makes you happy stick with it but if your partner makes you feel miserable or unhappy then walk away without regrets because real love will eventually find you when you least expect it.

Hope that helps Milly x

I am, and have been for a while, going through a divorce. We've been separated since September of 2017. I recently reconnected with the first girl, now a woman lol, that I ever fell in love with. We met on a playground when I was 9. She stole my heart at hello. She's flying in to see me this month. I'm not letting "the one that got away" get away this time.

What happened then Tony?

I've been waiting a year......