The Darkest Memories

Felt so worthless and dirty,
shadows from the past comes haunting,
regrets continue a-knocking by,
the darkest memories screaming within,

What's done is done,
no point trying to turn back time,
no use pretending it's never happened,
no rewind button to undone everything,

But I'm not satisfied with all those,
i felt worthless realising that i've been used again and again,
it's so dirty,
and i really felt like peeling my skins off,

I can't believe that I'm so gullible,
trusted people so easily,
assumed their actions to be good for me,
sometimes i feel so dumb,

Please God i beg you,
those times are enough,
wash the darkness off me,
let me live a whole new life,

I don't want to be bugged for a lifetime,
don't want to be living wih those nightmares so dark,
without them I'll be so much carefree,
without them I can go to him without feeling so worse,

I wish for the best to happen,
for the darkness to fade,
a brand new life is what i want,
the past please go away,

It's torturing me,
eating me up bit by bit,
makes me grasp for breath,
I'm defenseless against them,

I'm a female afterall,
who won't mind that happening to them?
who'll still live their lives as though nothing happened?
I can't do it,
and I'm tired of getting reminded of it day by day..