Windows to my Soul

Often I'm smiling, eyes just as bright
And thats when my day is good, every things alright
But there are times when I go blank, no ones home
And thats when I'm unavailable, in a world of my own

Don't stand outside these windows, and think every things OK
Because on the other side, theres nothing there pain
Being left alone so often, left in nothing but the black
And when the hurt finally hits me, I've had a heart attack

In the middle of this fight, a prisoner of war
In the end, I really ask, whats all this for?
If life isn't enough, I have to deal with it alone
No one to turn to, and no one to lean on

And when I think I've found my goal
It brings back life to my soul
And I realize that its OK, I'm still alive
Then I'm wondering how I survived

The windows to my soul tell stories never been told
They tell of all the pain, new and old
How i wish i wasn't confused, and how I want it to end
But then I realize something, I could I ever win?
*****************