First word I said after I'd read this poem was :
! WoW !
this is really professional, this is great, the poem is so full of emotions & depression.
I love it huun, I miss you geddan, its been hell too long,I hope You're Okay
Actually I wouldnt dare to write a poem like this in the middle of my exams :D
anyway you keep amazing me =)
Lost in silence
It seems like I got a curse
Madness made me kiss the ground
Like a dumb doll screaming out loud
=> This stanza was a good begin. It woke my interests. "Madness made me kiss the ground." This made me wondering...does the "ground" here mean "hell, evil etc".
But no one is going to let me go
They keep destroying the invisible me
=> "Invisible me".. So, could it be there is a visible and invisible part of you in the poem... Maybe I am mentally retarded and thinking too much.. :P
I act like a blind girl holding a black mirror
Trying to look at herself through her pretty dead eyes
=> This is getting a bit dark...
They can't see my bleeding veins nor hear my pain
While they believe the serpent's tears
This cold red rain may fill my emptiness
But will never hide me from my illness
=> You really painted a image on my head...
Now Hell is just my home and Heaven
I figured out that life and death are the same
=> Interesting idea, certainly..
People's life is full of sins and shame
But the weak person is always the only one to blame
=> Yeah, tell me about it.. People need someone to blame... :/
Those people are like dark mirrors
That won't let me see my reflection in their eyes
=> This is pretty cool... Brilliant. Best part of the poem.
My angelic evil face is ruined in their thoughts
Not because of my blindness but because of their rejection
=> Wow...This poem made me really think.
such a nice poem,you deeply impressed me with this one,loved it (5/5)
I got one of my poem "when some one leaves for ever" on top ranking list,please read my this poem,and comment and rate it as well....corrections or criticism from your side will be apriciated.
words from your side mean alot to me.
Do rank it,Thanks
I am deeply thankfull to you that you have rated and made comments on my poem in the near past.
I have submitted my peom "Child Beggar Noshi",That i wrote when i was a Student of Civil Engineer,this is a real story of a Young Girl,and when i meet her,i was deeply grieved to see her condition.Kindly read my poem "Child Begger Noshi" and rate and Comment on it,to let me know,did it touched your heart or not
You won my heart by commenting on my poem....i am expecting that you do this favour again
I loved it. It made me feel that a soul is trapped searching for how it will be judged by others even though they know not how that soul came to be. It's a great reflection of the trapped and confused inner soul. Neither an evil spirit nor a good force because neither truly exist except through perception. Therefore what defines us as good or bad is but a reflection. The sadness of reality. 5/5
11 years ago
Brilliant... absolutely brillant... YOU are the talented one!