Comments : Dark mirrors

  • 15 years ago

    by unblue skye

    Amazing poem.
    I don't no how to explain wut I felt...
    It was great :D
    It gives me plenty of story ideas! Lol.
    5/5.
    Very strong and beautifully written.
    Wen i read this;
    But the weak person is always the only one to blame.

    So many things crossed my mind.
    Love it. =]]

    Great job, again. =]]

    --**Skye~

  • 15 years ago

    by La ShOrTy

    Let me just say.. Very well written, well frazed, very catchy wordss.. It makes you wonderr.. Keep doing a great job..

  • 15 years ago

    by WaitAutumn

    Impressing
    loved the images you painted

    **Madness made me kiss the ground
    Like a dumb doll screaming out loud**
    **Those people are like dark mirrors
    That won't let me see my reflection in their eyes**

    those were just the best for me. They really played along in my head.

  • 15 years ago

    by Bekka Smekka

    Wow, you write so beautifully. i love the almost dark essence to it! thanx for your comments on mine! well done xx

  • 15 years ago

    by Dutch

    Wow.
    I especially liked;
    "But no one is going to let me go
    They keep destroying the invisible me
    I act like a blind girl holding a black mirror
    Trying to look at herself through her pretty dead eyes"

    wonderful way of expressing things. simple, but beautiful and also direct.
    lovely. 5 from me.
    xxx

  • 15 years ago

    by robbie

    Thnx for the kind words
    nice job here.

  • 15 years ago

    by Shellaine shelli

    Wow, darling that was amazing!!!
    I could really relate to that
    and feel the same way each day of my life.
    ''my angelic evil face is ruined in their thoughts''
    That line was my favorite out of all the amazing 1s in this poem.
    Life and death is basically the same thing and it really is so true.
    I've always believed that earth is just a mere glimpse of hell.
    Another truly beautiful write.
    Keep it up and take care!!!!

  • 15 years ago

    by BlueEyedMystery

    Well, I'm going to be a little picky here..

    It seems like I got a curse
    `` It should be: "It seems like [I've] got a curse[.] Glancing through your poem, I notice you don't have any punctuation, and I think it's very important to have punctuation in poetry. It helps the peice flow better, because you know when to pause and stuff.

    Like a dumb doll screaming out loud
    `` I like the use of the word "doll" here. It almost makes it have a scary beautiful atmosphere. I didn't really like the word "dumb" though. I just think it's too simple and doesn't really add to the poem. Maybe try dense or foolish? It's your poem though, so if you like it, then don't change it.

    While they believe the serpent's tears
    `` Oooh, this was a great line. Putting "serpent's tears" in there really makes it seem evil, because of the serpent who offered Eve the apple, which was a sin. At least that's what I think about when I hear the word "serpent". Either way, amazing line. :]

    Now Hell is just my home and Heaven
    I figured out that life and death are the same
    People's life is full of sins and shame
    But the weak person is always the only one to blame
    `` Oh wow. I wasn't expecting you to build on the whole serpent thing. I love this stanza, it's the best one yet. I think you're trying to say in the second line that you feel like you're dead even when you're alive. Hmm. I don't know though, I could be wrong.

    My angelic evil face is ruined in their thoughts
    `` "angelic evil face" <--- I love the contradiction here. I think contradictions in poems really make the reader wonder.. because it messes with their brain. Haha. I loved it! x]

    Overall, I liked this, just keep in mind about the punctuation. I think it'd really help the flow. :]

    Keep writing!

    ..|CAYYCE|..

  • 15 years ago

    by Yeka

    Dude loev this poem.....it shows the inner darkness that in your heart....keep writing great poems love it (^_^)

  • 15 years ago

    by dante

    Wow....not much else i can say to that, just wow....love the fusion of both rhyming and free verses, it added a lot of freedom to express and you definantly have a LOT of skill. throughout this offering i felt a hint of acceptance mingled with deep sadness and neglect,i hope that i read it right

  • 15 years ago

    by linderrrxo

    That was great i love i it soo much thank you for the comment

  • 15 years ago

    by Marie

    Wonderful poem

  • 15 years ago

    by tigerdan

    Hey, Goth marionette, I think your poem is very uniquely AWsome! Very expressive. Your discriptions in your poem, primarily what makes it very unique. ;)

  • 13 years ago

    by victoria

    Wow.I...wow.i have no words. I loved this. I love the darkness of it. The mirrors, the "life and hell" are all the same.
    wonderful.

    victoria