Every day is the same

"Every day is the same as the last
watching time flow by hoping it goes by fast
not knowing how much longer I can last
wishing for a spell that I could cast"

I like the start of your poem, its powerful and the emotion draws readers in. I like the fact that you made every last word rhyme, I completely forgot what exactly that is called but you did it. Its a different type of poetry when you have every last word rhyme at the end of a stanza or a part of a poem, normally a stanza but what you did made the poem even better than it already it.

"to change this life a.k.a. hell
thinking to myself "oh well"
Cause anything I try is doomed to fail
If only I could find a real wishing well

Such strong emotions and passion in this poem. It really is dark and depressing.

"I would wish to be someone I'm not
someone who is easily forgot
then I would put together a plot
and put myself in a position to get shot"

This part was great, the words flew by really well. I'm still admiring the fact that your rhyming every last word, for four lines. I have trouble doing that but it seems like you did this so easily.

"Forever gone no more I am
thanks to my brilliant plan
then I wake feeling the breeze from my fan
alas I'm right back where it all began"

This poem is starting to sound like a story, which is a good thing most poetry should have a beginning a middle and an end. This has to be my favorite part in the whole poem. Your honesty here is so raw that it makes the poem amazing.

"why must I wake with the job almost complete
I was so close to being six feet deep
my memory alone is all that was left to keep
but now all I can do is weep"

I like the fact that your asking your readers this, questioning them, talking to them.

"but I realize some truth
this comes straight from my brain
when it rains it pours
so learn to dance in the rain"

Again so true, your being honest through out the whole poem and many will be able to relate to this. Good job. And indeed it's true "When it rain it pours, so learn to dance in the rain" that is an amazing line. and this was such a good poem. Just remember as you always told me "its always darkest before dawn" you'll get through this, I know you will. I believe in you. Mahal kita iniibig kita.

Very true...
I love dis..

Oh my. so so much emotion in this. i say that with a lot of poems, but it's definitely felt here. i love how this was written. you got your message across in the most perfect of ways. keep it up :)