The Girl Who Killed Herself

What will a leave behind?
The guy I want that I can't ever get?
The friends I never had?
The family that thinks I'm psycho?
The fat ass that I have?
What about my bad grades in school?
Or my hideous face?
Why wouldn't I do it?
I am prepared.
I am about to go.
"Please God, forgive me", I say.
As I slowly pass away.
I took a knife,
And a gun,
To see what I could do.
I picked the knife.
It was more quiet.
So silently,
I start to say,
"Sorry for wasting my life away".
I quickly jab the knife,
As hard as I can,
And I wake up next to the hospital bed.
I see myself,
There I am,
For I am surely dead