Without a reason

by Brad Quammen   Aug 14, 2008


Why am I feeling all of this pain for no apparent reason?
This is really brutal and agonizing on my heart.
Its affecting everything in my life I can't function correctly.
The poetic side of my self has heightened.
But I still end up wanting to cry after every line I write.
These words are pouring out of me flowingly.
Even with this depression and anger building up.
All these issues are arising and the simplest things set me off.
I just want to be normal again this isn't good.
I love being able to write but I hate the feeling-
Of being broken and torn without a reason.
My visions blurry and my hands are shaky,
The doctors say there's nothing wrong with me.
My friends say that it will pass,
And my family doesn't know or understand a thing.
I know in my heart that this is true pain.
As brutal and as rabid that this pain may be-
Everyone goes through it as least once in a lifetime.

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  • 11 years ago

    by Lindsey

    "Why am I feeling all of this pain for no apparent reason?
    This is really brutal and agonizing on my heart.
    Its affecting everything in my life I can't function correctly."

    I like how in these lines you introduce the pain you're feeling, but you recognize you don't really know why you feel that way, you just do. It doesn't just seem like ordinary sadness where it leaves after a while, it is 'brutal and agonizing' and seems unrelenting. Good word choice. It shows us how much it really hurts you and how its effects your everyday life. It sorta reaches out to the audience, which is good =]

    "The poetic side of my self has heightened.
    But I still end up wanting to cry after every line I write.
    These words are pouring out of me flowingly.
    Even with this depression and anger building up."

    I love that first line. It sounds as if you're pain has unleashed the poet inside you, and in turn your poems have become an outlet for release.
    I like how you mention the words come easily through the sadness, but you still find yourself crying despite it. I think those last two lines could have been worded a little differently, but they still pack a punch and fit in okay, so no harm there.

    "All these issues are arising and the simplest things set me off.
    I just want to be normal again this isn't good."

    I totally relate to that first line...For me its like issues have become so numerous even small splashes feel like giant ocean waves crashing down...So you're not alone there.

    "I love being able to write but I hate the feeling-
    Of being broken and torn without a reason."

    Aww =[...I completely understand. Its seems like writing makes you happy, but it reminds you of the broken and torn feeling you feel...It's like the feelings you have take away a good thing about something you love...again, know how to relate...

    "My visions blurry and my hands are shaky,
    The doctors say there's nothing wrong with me.
    My friends say that it will pass,
    And my family doesn't know or understand a thing.
    I know in my heart that this is true pain."

    This seems to be something a lot of people go through...knowing you're in pain while no one else can see anything wrong...This line I think is something a lot of people can understand.

    "As brutal and as rabid that this pain may be-
    Everyone goes through it as least once in a lifetime."

    This is a good closing line, I think. It sounds as though you're reassuring yourself and others that the pain, however difficult it is to deal with, is not unconquerable. It shows you have hope for one day being able to get past it.

    I really enjoyed this one. You had good word choices and you were able to write your thoughts an a way others could understand and relate too. So all in all, a great poem. I enjoyed reading it. It made me sad to know what you have to go through, but hopeful too because you seem like you're on your way to getting better.

    -linz =]

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