Every Bone

This raw anguish has since relaxed its fingers from my strings,
who's presence I have felt only sparingly, fleetingly before in the whittled breaths of my life,
its whispers softer than your silence, its strength
strong enough to choke the sight from my eyes.
My heart stutters, faltering with the harsh beating of my own fate, my readiness to put myself in your place.
I don't want to go.
Knots twist like fanged serpents in my gut, tightening, tightening.. And glee at toying once-idly
with my heart the most excruciating punishment, life springs to the fingers again,
but its too sickening an irony for me to laugh. No, not now.
My tangled, puckered ribs do not pulse with waves of happiness this time
and it is only a matter of seconds, minutes, days, weeks, months,
years even, where our reckoning will hit..
And we will either triumph, or fail in our utmost misery,
but know
that I would sooner shatter every bone, every tendon, rip every eyelash and hair from my body,
than to live in a world where you didn't exist.