Blinding Myself

This lie's become a part of me
For months, I've played this game
Acting like it doesn't hurt
Each time I hear his name

Ignoring what's inside of me
Pretending I've moved on
As if the feelings I once had
For him are somehow gone

Spending each and every day
With happiness and laughs
Forgetting all our memories
Avoiding photographs

Using all of my effort
Hoping the pain would go away
Each day, I remembered less
Making everything seem ok

But yesterday when I saw him
For the first time since he left
My heart stopped for a moment...
I couldn't catch my breath

When suddenly it hit me
As the tears started to flow
That even after all this time...
I still can't let him go.

****Words and work from TinyDancer