Words On My Skin.

So I pick up that pen,
And I write the words.
Whatever I feel like.
It ranges from the sweet "Kiss Me"
to the more scary "Kill Me"
Now its "Trani Boy"
Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever use
The knife instead,
Like I ever imagine.
Carve the words permanently over my skin,
Until the blood gushes out,
I'll look into my own reflection,
Only to want to cut deeper next time.
This won't stop screaming at me,
"You are trapped, stop trying"
And yet, sometimes I do stop.
But I am still here,
Though thats because I don't have the guts,
To actually do the job yet.
I'll get there one day,
The day I cut my throat.
Maybe this is can at ease.
No matter what I do,
This seems to keep following my steps.
They aren't just thoughts anymore.
They are a part of me.
Its just a matter of time,
Before the day blood drips from my neck,
Finally comes.