Possible Entrapments

by Kenny   Feb 23, 2009


I ever wonder if we were in a vast ocean
Imprisoned within the heart of a colossal storm
Inviting us to embrace the welcoming death
Yet we remain calm, exchanging our final breath

I ever wonder if we were in a fairytale
Our souls lost within the depths of eternity
Entrapped in a cell of everlasting admiration
Yet possibilities of escape is not an option

I wonder if we were beneath a sickening rain
Confined within an emerging, warm ecstasy
Devouring our hearts to fled the effects of reality
Yet we persist no departure, from this heartfelt unity

I wonder if I were ensnared within your web
Entrapped within your genuine tender love
Hypnotizing me deeper within an absolute peace
Yet I remain satisfied, wishing for no release

---
Copyright (c) Kenny
2009

0


Did You Like This Poem?

Latest Comments

  • 15 years ago

    by Michael D Nalley

    You are a master at poetic flow and your depth is most impressive

  • 15 years ago

    by Jenni Marie

    "I ever wonder if we were in a vast ocean
    Imprisoned within the heart of a colossal storm
    Inviting us to embrace the welcoming death
    Yet we remain calm, exchanging our final breath"

    ^^I adore this opening, so full of depth and emotion with a flawless flow and beatiful imagery that I can't help but be pulled into the piece, and want to read more.

    "I ever wonder if we were in a fairytale
    Our souls lost within the depths of eternity
    Entrapped in a cell of everlasting admiration
    Yet possibilities of escape is not an option"

    ^^This is an amazing way to carry the poem forward, a very strong stanza and I like how you're starting each one with the things you wonder about.

    "I wonder if we were beneath a sickening rain
    Confined within an emerging, warm ecstasy
    Devouring our hearts to fled the effects of reality
    Yet we persist no departure, from this heartfelt unity"

    ^^I love the meaning here, the sincerity and feeling is incredible, easily felt by the reader and the love shows through every written word.

    "I wonder if I were ensnared within your web
    Entrapped within your genuine tender love
    Hypnotizing me deeper within an absolute peace
    Yet I remain satisfied, wishing for no release "

    ^^Ahhh..what a beautiful way to close this piece, hard hitting and strong, something that stays with the reader and has an impact upon the final lines.

    I found the flow to be flawless throughout, the imagery was beautifully created within every line and I really enjoyed the rhyming.

    Beautifully and elegantly written.

  • 15 years ago

    by kelleyana

    "I ever wonder if we were in a vast ocean
    Imprisoned within the heart of a colossal storm
    Inviting us to embrace the welcoming death
    Yet we remain calm, exchanging our final breath."
    Waw this poem is just wonderful. Very well written. I am please 5/5, kel.

  • 15 years ago

    by Italian Stallion

    Wonderful write, full of emotion. The flow was good but like the last people I commented it could've been better with punctuation, I can't stress enough how important punctuation is within a poem. Overall this was a well written piece.

    ``````````
    I ever wonder if we were in a vast ocean
    Imprisoned within the heart of a colossal storm
    Inviting us to embrace the welcoming death
    Yet we remain calm, exchanging our final breath

    ^^I liked the rhythm and rhyme, nice start to a wonderful poem. I liked how you used the word, "colossal" you don't see that a lot...

    ``````````
    I ever wonder if we were in a fairytale
    Our souls lost within the depths of eternity
    Entrapped in a cell of everlasting admiration
    Yet possibilities of escape is not an option

    I wonder if we were beneath a sickening rain
    Confined within an emerging, warm ecstasy
    Devouring our hearts to fled the effects of reality
    Yet we persist no departure, from this heartfelt unity

    ^^I admire how you used repetiton within this piece, it really prevails the emotions and depths of this poem. I fully enjoyed this line and I like the way it was worded, "Entrapped in a cell of everlasting admiration"

    ``````````
    I wonder if I were ensnared within your web
    Entrapped within your genuine tender love
    Hypnotizing me deeper within an absolute peace
    Yet I remain satisfied, wishing for no release

    ^^Excellent ending to a fantastic write, but like I mentioned above, I feel it could've been better with punctuation.

    ``````````

    Overall a well written piece of poetry, keep up the great work.

    Peace, Joe