Comments : Broken Down Road

  • 15 years ago

    by Michael D Nalley

    Broken Down Road
    by Ilikepurple222

    "Covered up paths.
    You barely know where to turn to next.
    Wouldn't it make life easier if all you saw were neon
    signs telling you where to go each step of the way?"

    wow I can really relate to those powerful lines

    "Though for some reason,
    all of the lights went out.
    You stand in the middle of the road
    waiting for some hint of hope in this life.
    Cause so far it hasn't done much in your favor.
    You catch a glance to the left,
    and then to the right.
    Somewhere deep inside of you is saying
    to go forward and never look back."

    I am with you, and I see you are maintaining a great flow, you are connecting.

    "There were no chances of that.
    A view of emptiness is all that lies behind you now.
    A broken down road that's been covered up
    and finally laid to rest.
    The rain starts to fall just as the forcast had predicted. Tears trickle down your face and begin to feel warm"

    I am still with you but my word processor is red lining forcast, which is supposed to be forecast and it would be a shame for the grammar to kill the message for a shallow spelling mistake

    "against the coolness of your skin.
    Falling to the ground,
    you throw your hands over your ears and scream.
    Where do you go once the road's been abandoned? "

    I feel your pain, but kind of want to hold out hope that all have not abandoned the road

    Yet I must give you a 5 for reflecting the way you felt as you wrote this

  • 15 years ago

    by Jad

    This was really good poem and the emotion and feelings put in this poem is really good too. The imagery was in there but it was free verse and sometimes it hard. The flow was off in some places to. Overall this was a really good poem.

  • 15 years ago

    by shadowed heart

    I really enjoyed this poem. It was very insightful. I could just picture everything. Thanks for the comment also. :)

  • 15 years ago

    by kiley

    "You stand in the middle of the road
    waiting for some hint of hope in this life."

    ^^^ i can relate to that line. :]
    another poem that i enjoyed reading.
    :)
    you're really good at expressing emotions or yeah i don't know how to put it in words, but it was amazing again. :D
    great job :) !