The end

Every night I close my eyes,
and hope to never see another day.
And every morning they open again,
and I die another way.

I've started popping pills again,
trying to numb the pain.
But nothing seems to cure the hurt,
I've nothing left to gain.

I haven't been happy,
in so many years.
I could fill the deepest cavern,
with all of my fears.

I cried myself to sleep last night,
trying to hide the regret.
Of the day when I was born,
the day that was never supposed to be met.

I DON'T WANT TO LIVE THIS "LIFE",
and so many times I've tried,
to just end it all,
to stop all my pathetic lies.

If there is a God,
I hope he can see,
that I'm falling apart.
That I wish I wasn't me.

A past full of abuse,
drugs and mistakes.
How long will it be
Until I finally break?