Nik
So much sadness captured within your words. Great imagery and word choices.

Collect the minuscule pieces
and tape them to a bird. This is
the only way my soul can reach heaven.
There is no redemption after
the things I have seen.
No exception for the life I have lead.
I am the beast--
not the beauty.
The petal-less rose.
The horizon with no sunset

What a deep and intense piece. We can only move on once we have learned to forgive ourselves. Yet so many of us punish ourselves over and over again.
Excellent!
Love Cindy

Nik, God never forgets us no matter what. People around us might, but never Him, so you see you are not really lost.

Really deep with emotion and it just showed through each word. Nothing I can say but a job well done.

Very good Ms/ Nik
Dark, sad and emotional. Well written in the style I am use to expecting from your talents.

I can't say enough about this dark poem, Though a rarely write frree flowing poems such as this I do enjoy reading a good one.

Wow... this was really deep and sad it was so dark and powerful an image of realization but i have to say a few places seemed forced but it didnt take away from the poem

I thought this line was very strong "I exist only to die all over again" Its almost like you understand that you'll love again but it'll surely be the same outcome. But just like somebody who can open our eyes to new worlds, that same somebody can save us from being lost. Great work 5/5

I really liked this. you did have a very effective word choice. and that made the feeling so much more intense, and all that went well with the imagery. A+ 5/5 for sure

~Ben

Very well expressed. This is so deep, so dark, so beautiful. I just love the way you have expressed yourself in such a moving manner. 5/5
WakingFreedom

This is deep. Its dark like luminescently dark but beautiful Nik.
You have a wonderful talent of expression 5/5

Again a very heartfelt piece. i can tell you put alot of yourself into your writing. but the flow and rythm were off. i am not talking about contrived flow and rythm, where each line only has a certain amount of sylables or whatever, but the natural rythm of speech. and the reason this bothers me is because there is nothing wrong in the words you used, but only in where you break up the sentances. because if i reread it but break up the sentances differently. it does have a natural flow to it. i think maybe you should read it aloud to see where the sentances should be broken up

personaly i feel the flow would be better like

Silence passes
through this room
that holds me in
this haunted place.
Back and forth
my screams they bounce

see nearly no real change at all. but i feel it flows better when read aloud. but then that is just my opinion

or if you dont like writing in short lines you could write like this also

Silence passes, through this room
that holds me in, this haunted place.
Back and forth ,my screams they bounce

Overall i loved the poem and whole retrospect of it. What i didnt like was the way you set up your "stanzas". It seems like you just set it up that way because you think its the way a poem should be set up. Each line is like a small pause. For example

I love to eat away at the humanity of all.(pause)
I can not wait to see them fall.

OPPOSED to

I love to eat away
(pause)
at the humanity of all.

See it just sounds weird
and also with reading it makes it very hard to read. Again overall it was great, sorry to of been harsh but thats what you get when you ask for comments :).

5/5