Where'd the years go?

She lies in her bed,
the rain tapping on the window.
She reflects on her life...
Where'd the years go?

The walls close in,
and then fade away.
She's tumbling back
into a yesterday.

She sees herself,
with the pills in her hand.
Ready to swallow them,
at the pain's command.

"I'm not worth the trouble."
Is the last thing she said.
She washes them down,
ready to be dead.

Time passes so fast,
Yet moves so slow.
Watching herself she thinks,
"Where'd the years go?"

And then a slow fade,
a year later she's been set free.
She got locked away,
for trying to end what was never meant to be.

She learned all their tricks,
she hides behind a smile.
But the pain still lives there,
and it's been growing all the while.

It's 8 months later...
she's made another mistake.
And this time she decides
it's all she can take.

She turns to the cabinet,
and pulls out some relief.
She swallows all she can find,
she wants the end to be brief.

Hours later she is lying,
so cold on the floor.
The ice flows through her veins,
she's trembling at the core.

She musters her strength,
just enough to say.
"Dear God, please,
DON'T LET ME DIE THIS WAY."

She wakes up in her bed,
not knowing how she got there.
And then she remembers,
that forsaken prayer.

She screams to the sky,
Why did you hear?
You never listened when I wanted to die,
Last night was only fear!

Two months later here she is,
in bed, rain at her window...
And all I can think is,
"Where'd the years go?"