Freewriting (just a random freestyle, dont bash it too hard lol)

Randomly strolled back unto this site after years and years
Years of pain, Years of anguish
Free from writing... substances keeping me sane
Alcohol and smoking to numb the pain
No pen, no paper, no razor, no wrist just here reminiscing on what I miss
Here alone typing away on the keyboard.. releasing what I've had stored
Old friends lost through hate, new friends gained through mistrust
I'm alone amidst those surrounding me...
An emotional amputee
Why should I trust who I don't know?
They say you reap what you sow
What did I plant to get into a situation like this?
You can say karma and that life's a b!t%h
I'll look you in the eye and say f@%k that $h!t