Comments : Sad Poem

  • 12 years ago

    by Ms Happiness

    Nice poem5/5:)

  • 12 years ago

    by Yakari Gabriel

    You won't rest next to my eyes
    when I rouse with tomorrow,

    ^
    this already sets the atmosphere,
    with this very phrase you had me..
    i just thought...sigh..okay this is going to be something...

    tonight will be the last dream
    I dare to let go, and last hope
    I give up on
    ^
    this is so simply put,yet it weights..
    ..it all comes so effortlessly to you doesnt it ? -_-'

    No longer will I cleanse my soul
    with the warmth of a spotless
    ray that dresses my bed with
    its cheerful awareness

    ^
    naw mean..
    this had me thinking of mel (melpomene)
    because it is exactly what she does to me sometimes..leaves me with a straight face...the kind when you go like "damn guys :|' who even thinks of dressing a bed with rays? like seriously...where does it come from? and besides that the image of a bed full of sun rays was very beautiful...
    thank you for that... i wished i could capture it to show you all i get in my mind when i read your poetry...

    At dawn I will go blind and light
    you will no longer emerge into
    the darkness of my eyes,
    won't dazzle me with magic
    that glows and only glows
    beyond my wisdom

    ^
    i have heard of light within eyes,
    have heard of sparkly eyes
    ive heard of placing smiles in eyes..
    but light no longer emerging into the darkness of the eye...like..(wanna say the f word again)...

    it funny because,although your pieces are so highly relate-able they are extremly unique...and you would never sound cheesy,not even if you tried...it just doesn't happen...you're too good.

    :)

  • 12 years ago

    by Decayed

    Bad. Fair. Good. Very Good.... EXCELLENT!!!!

    :p

    It always feels refreshing to read your poems!

    5/5

  • 12 years ago

    by nouriguess

    You are amazing...totally completely endlessly..... amazing..

  • 12 years ago

    by nouriguess

    AND LOL bahahahaa now i know where you got the title from!!!!! you got it from the sections!!! hahahahaha :P:P

  • 8 years ago

    by Ben Pickard

    A very accomplished piece of writing. Excellent. Picked at random and pleased I did!