It all started with not talking to people when I got stressed out. I know there were a lot of people there for me, and there still are; but I just didn't want to bother them and I thought that I could take care of myself. As always, I thought wrong. My stress kept getting worse and worse. I was smoking a lot more than I usually do when it comes to cigarettes. I wasn't eating as much as I used to. I thought I was going to be okay, but I was wrong. I was always angry and more depressed than usual. One day my boyfriend was asking me if I was alright and what was on my mind. I told him the truth. I said to him that I feel numb and angry, and that I afraid that I'm going push him away from me once again like I did last time. He said to me that he's there for me whenever I need someone to talk to. I knew that I should of talked to him, but I didn't want to because I thought I could take care of myself. The next day I ended up being really stressed out, then my mom brought up something I did months ago but she just found out. And that's when I couldn't take it anymore. I freaked out at my mom and my step dad, and more and more of my anger came out. I wanted to get out of my house because I knew that if I would stay there that I'd end up cutting myself. And that's when I was correct. But this time I cut a bit more deep than usual. I was feeling dizzy and I told my step dad. My mom, step dad, and I went to the E.R. and I didn't need stitches, but they used this type of super glue. Now the scar is healed, but now I feel the urge and want to cut myself. I couldn't resist it, and that's when I relapsed.
