There's a rush
between the many folds
of my flesh;
like a fast,
upbeat love song
in an afternoon ride.

^The opening was so well penned, it made me want to read further, because I wasn't sure on the direction at this point, I thought maybe it was to do with weight, as the reference to folds in flesh, but then I thought maybe it was a little deeper so I wanted to keep reading

-Never ending-
a lithe man inside,
clad in opportunities
and monotony of purpose,

^I am still thinking something to do with weight and health, referring to a slender man inside, wanting to come out

yet, still I am
but a passerby.

^But you still are the same person and not changing

Contented and consumed
by the passing world-
of flickering, fading
hints of its flight,
as the father time
sits on my palm.

^Time passes by and you still haven't achieved your goal but you are content

I am learning to exist:
half alive, half asleep
without a sweat in my stride
for someday-somehow
I will dwell like a sun,
dreaming under

headstone spires.

^Knowing the weight may kill you in the end, but not wanting to do anything about it, learning to live the way you are.

I liked this, it was a great take on the subject and a really flowing piece

xx

I love the first stanza - to me I read it as though it is talking about a particular body type but then I thought maybe it's describing something like onions. How onions have many layers - this person has many layers (personality wise) and this rush you are speaking of is going through all of these layers

I feel this poem is about someone living their life but not LIVING their life - they go through life watching everything around them get better and improve but they just sit there and watch as a passenger.

It reminds me like a person with a passive personality.

Such description in the poem and a very enjoyable read!

x

Ms. Queen
I think there is a much deeper meaning than meets the eye on first or second read...I've found my way back a few times trying to pinpoint it.
The only part I question is this:

as the father time
sits on my palm

^^^^ I love the symbolism of father time, an old man holding a scythe and an hourglass or time device. But I dont think you need the "the" before father time. Hes just Father Time....so I dont think u need THE. But you decide

It was a great piece and good luck dear in the weekly. Take care
Lostlove

Whatever the meaning behind that,...
(and I think it's about time.... and what you're gonna be someday..) I really like the figurative language of yours.. It's so unique, and you entice anyone, a poetry reader or a scientific magazine one!

I am learning to exist:
half alive, half asleep
without a sweat in my stride
for someday-somehow
I will dwell like a sun,
dreaming under

headstone spires.

Awesome piece and the ending blew me away.EXALT!

Here is the comment I had promised. :)

First of all I agree to Lostlove1, I feel like I can't seem to grasp the meaning of the poem just yet.. I've read it a few times and I always find something new, whether it adds to the meaning I first thought I had "found" or even is something completly new.
Even though I think my speculation might go a wrong way I'll dare trying but before that I will point out what I especially liked.
I think the title is quite nice because everybody knows what a passenger seat is yet knowing that doesn't necessarily bind them to know what your poem is about, quite the contrary.
Also when I first read it I was thinking about movement, the passenger is moving, but he doesn't cause the movement, that is caused by the driver themself.
What I like is the fact that this movement is displayed in your very first line and whole stanza even, actually I was reading the poem with a specific pace too, that absolutely underlines your words. It literally felt "-Never ending-" while reading at least though I know that is refering to the content rather than someone reading the poem, but I somehow thought there might be a connection anyway.
The love song reminded me off the driver, which the passenger would have to rely on and that is important in a relationship too, there is no relationship with one person only, it needs two..might be a bit far-fetched, but that is what I thought off.

"(..), still I am
but a passerby."
^ The speaker is refering to him-/herself as a passerby, obviously not satisfied with it, I wouldn't really say that the relationship I was refering to earlier ended, but rather that the perspective changed a little. The pace of movement decreased, but it still did not stop, it never stops. Maybe that movement is time actually, perhaps it is.

The next stanza made me think of aging, I do not know why exactly, but it did. The world does pass somehow and we are consumed by it in some way, but I'd not always say contented though I hope so. "Father Time sitting on your palm" reminded me of the aging process, one doesn't have wrinkels on their palm, but I thought of it anyway.

"half alive, half asleep"
^ I think this is quite interesting since those aren't really opposite yet it somehow feels like you used it like that.

I will admit, that I might have misunderstood most of your poem, but I probably misunderstood the last lines the most, obviously I can use English not being my mothertongue as excuse, but I'll explain what I thought it might mean:
I thought that you meant to bide like a sun, as in be remembered as someone powerful and shining, refering to their personality, like someone people literally look up to, bringing light, even when the speaker dies. I also liked the contrast of "sun" and "dreaming under".

I really enjoyed reading this poem and I hope my understanding of your poem isn't too far off.

I am learning to exist:
half alive, half asleep
without a sweat in my stride
for someday-somehow
I will dwell like a sun,
dreaming under

This was my favourite stanza. You have done a good job in penning this down. So much has already been said. Good work on this one.

Wow, i Love this peice. It it deep and shows the emotion from the heart. I felt that you expressed the fact that we just sit here going with the flow of time, learning "someday, somehow" we will be someone.

Great write! ^_^ 5/5

I absolutely loved this.

I could truly relate to the feeling you expressed of watching by as time is passing you by. Sometimes it feels like you're just a spectator watching the scenes unfold and you're not really a part of it all.

"as father time
sits on my palm."
^I loved the image your words created here. I like how you set time on your palm where in reality it sits on our wrist to glance at. Setting it in your palm shows that your hands hold the power to do whatever it pleases with the time given. That is what I got from this phrase.

"I am learning to exist:
half alive, half asleep"
^I could wholeheartedly relate with this. Sometimes it seems like everyone is living around me and I merely exist.

I am glad I came across this poem, it was an enjoyable read. Well done!

Dazzling as always

There's a rush
between the many folds
of my flesh;
like a fast,
upbeat love song
in an afternoon ride.

---- This stanza creates a picture in my mind. For some reason, I'm picturing someone in a car just driving in a never ending road with the windows down and listening to "the upbeat of a love song" while enjoying their ride. Just feeling the adrenaline running through the body as the wind caresses their hair..

In one word I can say that I feel FREEDOM with this stanza. Someone who is not afraid of being themselves. Some enjoying life.

-Never ending-
a lithe man inside,
clad in opportunities
and monotony of purpose,

---- with this one, I'm can just picture someone who has everything to be happy. It has all the resources to be "successful" in life, but it sticks with routine. It doesn't do more, I guess sort of afraid of taking risk and it just goes for what is safe. But its not exactly happy.

yet, still I am
but a passerby.

----and with this I feel the author is simply saying that you can see everything.
That she is like a spectator.

Contented and consumed
by the passing world-
of flickering, fading
hints of its flight,
as father time
sits on my palm.

---- and the author can assert or absorbs all the things that she sees around her.
how the world is changing, the decisions that we are taking and how all the little hints that are given to us are fading and we don't see them.. But she can see them because she a spectator, a passerby. She is aware of everything just as if she is looking at it from her palm...

I am learning to exist:
half alive, half asleep
without a sweat in my stride
for someday-somehow
I will dwell like a sun,
dreaming under

headstone spires.

---- And base on what she is seeing, the author is learning to live. She is trying to learn from other people's mistakes. And she is building up her self stem, character, confidence to walk with firm steps so that one day when her time is up she can just depart happy and relax for having to take the right path in her life.

Wow! This poem is so interesting! The last stanza was my favorite!

The title caught my eye. I like how this poem is about not really living or being seen by others.. You're living a half-life that is unfulfilled.

Really enjoyed this. Well done!