My Nightmare

Last night, I had a terrible nightmare
that seemed like it was real
it was so vivid, I woke up crying
scared to death and unable to deal
I'm going to tell you what happened
but, I believe that it will be
because this dream seemed like a warning
that was meant for just me:
my dad was driving our yellow suburban
and I was there too
we were in a tragic wreck
but I survived, not you
the pain that I felt
seemed to be all too real
But this couldn't be
How ever would I heal?
That kind of tragedy
Destroyed everything good about me
Because I've gotten this far
With the help of you, daddy
I am who I am
And not like my mother
Because you have raised me
And been a good father
The pain of my past
Was always with me
But because of you
My pain was less that I could see
I was only holding on by a thread
The tragedy made the pain hit me like never before
I had to believe this couldn't be real
Because these feelings & thoughts were too much to endure
I wouldn't go to your funeral
Because it hurt too much to bear
I stayed at home reading aloud my letters
Hoping you could hear them all the way up there
I blamed you and I loved you
Because I felt conflicted about the future now unforeseen
I loved you because, you treated me right, you loved me too, and
You're the only one who believed in me
That was my nightmare
And In my gut I know something bad is on its way
I just hope that this isn't it
Because I need you everyday