Comments : Paved In Blue

  • 11 years ago

    by sham pulok

    Love it

  • 11 years ago

    by Tara Kay

    Meme, You have like the most beautiful way of writing...It makes me feel like I am right there...

    This was so romantic, it was like a love song...it flowed and it had soul and heart and just oozed love in every line...I loved it!! I just loved it.

    Always, Meme...

    • 11 years ago

      by Meme

      Awwww, thank you so much sweetie :)

  • 11 years ago

    by Paul Gondwe

    Simply amazing in all possible ways i could think of and i did really thin of alot of them. This something i really wanted to read coz i can relate to it very well. The imagery is perfect, the wording brilliant and it is very sweet. The emotions are really felt. I really love this piece and with your permission, dedicate to this other girl..lol...

    I thought I owned the key of my
    own heart, and I always kept it
    away from reach. But you stole it
    and paved a road that bridged mine
    with yours.

    This stanza really spoke to me. We as a people think we are in complete control of our emotions unaware that there are forces stronger than us all. The ending is wonderful, you realize your heart is not only yours. One of my favs.

  • 11 years ago

    by Thomas

    Very sweet love poem Meme

    Your loved one is a lucky person ;)

  • 11 years ago

    by L

    This is a lovely 'sad' love' poem. I enjoy pieces that uses the sky, sun, night, etc.
    and this one is one of them. When I started reading, I could picture someone looking at the clouds in search for her beloved. It's sort like a dreamy person and I think that's what love does, it makes us all sleepy that we end up daydream and dreaming at all times.

    "I gazed at the sky, wishing for
    the clouds to shower your name.
    Inhaling with every deep breath
    a new hope, that you are exhaling
    in sighs of relief."

    -- I thought that with saying " that you are exhaling in sighs of relief" that perhaps you meant that you wish this person to be all right.

    You are the color blue in my sky
    And I ... I am the blush in yours.

    --- This lines gave me a sort of sad feeling because this someone is the blue in your sky but you are the blush.. and when someone blushes is usually out of embarrassment. However, I feel like in here you don't meant that, rather that you are the one that adds color to that blue. But perhaps, you did meant that since you are using the ellipsis and that adds some omission. . . and it makes me wonder... sort of like a sadden tone.

    I traced the stars until I was lost
    in the middle of a million twinkle,
    but its nothing compared to being
    lost in the crashing waves of your
    amber eyes.

    --- In here, it gave me the idea that you are trying to find a substitute for this someone. And that you are no longer looking at the clouds but to the stars.

    You are the guardian glow in my night
    And I ... I am the velvety black in yours.

    --- And see once again, there is this sad tone if I just think of it without thinking lol.. but if I think deeper.. then He is the light for you and your are, well, it seems like you are what makes this someone glow. because if that someone didn't have a black night then he wouldn't shine.

    I thought I owned the key of my
    own heart, and I always kept it
    away from reach. But you stole it
    and paved a road that bridged mine
    with yours.

    ---- From my understanding of this lines, this someone built a bridge with his heart and yours. So he stole the key of your heart just to open its door and be able to create the bridge. Nice idea. My favorite part

    You are the master of my heart
    And I ... I am the beats of yours.

    ---- Overall, there are some parts that may sound sad to me, but if I think deeper about it, It just seems that this person completes you, however, on some occasions it sounds like it controls your heart, hence, " you are the master of my heart." and it seems like you are vulnerable.. but then again, one can only be vulnerable if that other someone doesn't love in return.. but if it's returned then it's not.

    " and I am the beats of yours" See you make this person live. But seems like this person, I don't know how to explain it.. but the poem it does have a love tone. I'm not sure why I keep seeing sad tones in poem that are about love.. XD

    Well written.

  • 11 years ago

    by JDP

    Really Really like this!!

  • 11 years ago

    by One Man Clan

    The way you narrate your story through your poems Is unique to only you
    I don't know of anyone who can do the same thing
    you force the reader to be interested and you never fail to impress
    5/5

  • 11 years ago

    by Ray Blue

    Amazing lines~

    You are the guardian glow in my night
    And I ... I am the velvety black in yours.

    Superb work! great color too. 5/5!

  • 11 years ago

    by Decayed

    Whenever I read your pieces, I feel a little pink... it's like I'm singing 'la vie en rose' .. haha.. beautiful piece, Meme... and that line about blush, I remember it from facebook! Awesome

    • 11 years ago

      by Meme

      Hahaha, I feel pink tooooo. And I love La Vie En Rose one of my favorite songs :)

      Yaaa, it started as an FB status then it became a poem, lol :P

  • 11 years ago

    by eco greeny

    You are the guardian glow in my night
    And I...I am the velvety black in yours...

    wow........www