Holy f.... cow.

And it hurts to wait for you in order to write another masterpiece...!!

That's beautiful, dear...

Awesome , it's about time I saw another from you
Your style is awesome

Love it love it love it

"In and out, upside down"

Liked the rhythm created by these phrases, it's like when you read it aloud you could hear the smooth pace between each word.

As much as I love your old style, I think I am falling for this style. This poem proves that you are exploring perhaps another writing strategy. This poem seems to have more personality, so I think you were just being easy on yourself, hence, the natural flow of emotions.

I think the poem overall, was smartly constructed.

Good job!

I go with Yaki DANG! i LOVE THIS it has SO much emotion in it and i can feel the pain my dear 5/5

Lady Ashes

Within every scar, healing dwells. Forgiveness, opens a rare door.

Wow, this was breathtaking. So tragic.
I really loved your choice of words, it drew everything together.

"sadness upside down
camouflaged like raisins
sickly pro-insomniac clockwork"

Its Imaginations that transcend that boundaries..Thats what makes a poet complete !
About you work,Its simply awesome....I find you-expressing your feeling with deep emotions and the simple yet touching end makes it Beautiful !
And yes don't mind,I'll like to ask u a Question,
Are u an engineer ? haha......Its seems though !...Do reply !
Appreciated !!

I can't write because it hurts
to be honest, to rip my ribcage
apart and find out my heart had been
replaced by a time bomb, too long ago

^^^ that was once of my favorite parts in the poem the other one was teh ending and i really like the imagery that was put in the poem very nice job darling! :) 5/5

Queen Ashlin

Wow, what a great poem! I love how you start the first 3 stanzas with I can't and the last 3 with it hurts. Already by just quickly glancing at that, you let the reader know that this poem is not going to be an easy read. The title itself was an immediate attraction to me as I found myself asking how reason and sadness could be blended into a poem. Then I thought perhaps you are trying to explain the reason for your sadness. Needless to say I had to read it and I am so glad I did!

"I can't write because I'm not
allowing myself to breathe
in, or out, in this attempt
of finding my sadness upside
down, one hundred eighty
degrees around"

I love that you describe breathing stopping you from writing. I felt it said a lot about you as a poet as it gave me the impression that even you were dying (can't breathe) you would still want to write. How powerful!
Your description of sadness is particularly original. I've never heard of it described in that way but it works brilliantly. I think its realistic as, if sadness were a shape, it would be different to everyone. Great stuff!

"I can't write because raison
d'etre was lost in translation,
and all those stones you've thrown
my way had ended up muddied
and camouflaged like raisins
in the hands of a toothless child"

I have to commend you especially for this line "camouflaged like raisins in the hands of a toothless child," as it really created an image in my mind! Not only is it extremely original, it's very vivid! I was almost able to picture this child smiling and hiding the raisins. Brilliant!

"I can't write because it hurts
to be honest, to rip my ribcage
apart and find out my heart had been
replaced by a time bomb, too long ago"

I like that you included the words "it hurts" in this stanza as I feel that you are setting the platform for your next 3 stanzas. It almost seems like you are telling us, hey this is about to get darker and sadder. This is a great way to bring your reader in.
The idea of you ripping your own ribcage only to find that your heart had been replaced by a time bomb is amazing! Letting the reader know of the inevitability of it all! The ripping of the ribcage magnified the hurt for me which kept me wanting to read more. Powerful.

It hurts because whatever wire
I plug in, its pumping
remains an imitation of some
sickly pro-insomniac clockwork
no one ever bothered to dust off

My favourite part of this stanza (if not the whole poem) was "an imitation of some sickly pro-insomniac clockwork no one ever bothered to dust off." Why? For various reasons. Firstly because of how easy it is to relate to. Who hasn't felt that way at some point? Ignored, unloved and sickly. Powerful stuff. Secondly because the idea of a clock being unable to sleep is ironic but real. Lastly because of the rare way you describe your pain here too.

It hurts because I cannot say
what this voice whispers into my ear
whenever I hide beneath the blankets,
in fear of you entering my mind

This sounds quite like a horror story. It makes me think of one's thoughts being more haunting than ghosts themselves. The past maybe? Interesting indeed!

It hurts because my poetry
was always about you

These 2 lines brought the whole poem together for me and made it all make sense. I love that you use the word "you" here as it makes the reader think of someone who's hurt them! I personally went back and reread the poem and when relating it to myself, it was tremendously powerful! So in other words, by not saying who you are talking about, you make it much more relatable and engaging. I think whoever reads this poem can understand its emotional meaning to some level or another. Depending I guess on how much "it hurts."

Great poem with a lot of original descriptions and a lot of heartfelt emotion. 5/5 from me!