Misunderstood

Sitting silently in a dark quiet space,
the tears and the memories all start to race.
Thinking of the times when he makes me feel better, close to good;
it's hard to think when you become used to being misunderstood.
No one to talk to because no one seems to truly care...
I learned to not expect anything because a good life is rare.
Who can you trust when everyone has let you down?
Seems like my mouth was made to be a permanent frown.
What else can I do? I'm a grain in all of this sand;
just deal with what happens and handle it how I can...
When will everything get better though? That's all people say,
They all have me counting on that procrastinating day.
Where will I be if I'm gone and he's still here?
Losing you baby... that's my biggest fear...
Why does it seem like I'm living to pretend?
Like everything is fake and the point of life is to get to the end.
How can I explain what I'm saying when I don't know how to feel...
I can't think straight and everything I know is becoming unreal.