Comments : Without You - There's Nothing - I'm Nothing

  • 10 years ago

    by Midnight Sky

    Long but good keep it up

  • 8 years ago

    by Ben Pickard

    Lucero,

    I am glad I stumbled on this - it is brilliant. It has such a unique flavour, and the spacing gives it such a perfect stuttering flow, if that makes any sense at all. It works wonderfully.
    It has a surreal feel to it with the way your mind wonders throughout - the whole hour-glass thing is excellent. You weren't smoking anything illegal when writing this were you? lol

    Excellent free verse. All the very best,
    Ben

    • 8 years ago

      by Everlasting

      Lol Ben, I don't drink. I don't smoke. I don't do drugs. I just write when my chest aches.

  • 8 years ago

    by Ben Pickard

    I know you don't really, Lucero, which makes this all the better!

  • 7 years ago

    by Em

    Lucero this is really unique and beautifully written. I love the spacing as it gives the piece an extra kick (not that it needed 1)

    A wondering mind is a beautiful one. ..

    Em

  • 7 years ago

    by The Po whet

    Beautifully written, these lines got my attention and left me with a smile. "Turtles walk slowly, people walk fast, dogs run/no wonder some live for ages while some live until they die.

  • 7 years ago

    by Naughtymouse

    Luce this is freaking awesome, I think one of my favourite from you, I love the voice in this and Ben is right the spacing in this really help add to the feeling to it.

    Added to favourites, epic.

  • 7 years ago

    by Golden AnGel Rhapsodist

    Hi Luce,
    lucky me I read this one. .. I like it even the repetition of some lines making this write sounds like a song. ...I like the imaginary and the emotion. ...you need to close your eyes just to see him. ..damn I can relate to this one. ..

    Well done as always Luce

    Gel

  • 5 years ago

    by Noureddine

    Very nice poem

  • 4 years ago

    by Alaskan Husky


    in regards to the last image you gave me i was taken back timidly. the close of the prose, For me, is far too sullen. But the composition here is fantastic... I see what you mean of course -which lead one unto some eagerness to " justify" the details and images used in your piece . . . Contemplating. Tantalizing. Fun.

  • 3 years ago

    by M.Useless

    I love this one. Love the cadence, driving me to the next line. Thank you.