Past of ghosts

The ghost of past haunt me
Walk with me
My ghosts seem to be only ones wanting give me company
These wounds come back and haunt me
Why have I done so wrong
Why couldn't I be brave and strong
In all reality I'm cowering in corner instead
Trapped and cautious like dog been beaten and shood away
Wanting help so bad but can't bring myself to get it
instead I run the other way
Hurt lost confused
Unsure of myself and all around feeling trapped and just surviving
But not truly living
I wish u could feel what I feel day in and out
Not lecture me while knowing my past
I may look fine
But war rages in my mind
People say let go how do u untangle the mess
It like putting headphones in ur pocket and pull em out a mess
To feel the sorrow and fear I battle everyday
To know my mind and it owes the pain the past has caused
What if it can never be healed
Like damage from a bullet in a war crippling solider forever
What if the past is the bullet and my mind the soldier then what happens
To cry for help but not be heard like another homeless dump to be seen but not noticed